


Way down we go

by furiousflamewolf, zsab1016



Category: Tennis RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Criminals, Angst, Falling In Love, Gangs, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2019-12-12
Packaged: 2020-10-14 22:21:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 26,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20608274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/furiousflamewolf/pseuds/furiousflamewolf, https://archiveofourown.org/users/zsab1016/pseuds/zsab1016
Summary: After nearly 10 years Stans light had gone out. Thats what he had thought. That was until someone came by his coffee shop one day and taught him that everyone can find that light again.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title: Way down we go, Kaleo
> 
> Special thanks to my friend zsab1016 for putting up with my ramblings. Love you, bro. ❤❤❤

It was still dark when Stan opened his eyes. New York was cast in darkness. White dots illuminating Stans window front. If he was honest it was the best view. Waking up to New York cast in darkness. White flocks of snow has glued themselves to the window, melting slowly. Stan rolled around, pressing his arm against his eyes. His hand grabbing his phone to turn off the alarm. He loved waking up this early. It was part of his job.

One of his jobs.

Stretching his still dormant muscles Stan yawned and ran a hand through his hair. Trying to tame the wild locks that had occured due to sleep. His feet hitting the warm rug. Only clad in boxers Stan allowed himself to enjoy the view. A truly breathtaking view indeed. The room still cast in darkness Stan moved towards the bathroom which was located right next to his bedroom. Switching on the light and squeezing his eyes shut. 

Brushing his teeth and washing his face Stan looked at himself in the mirror. His hand brushing his stubbled chin. Maybe he should shave. It wasn't five yet and he had time. Taking his time shaved and took a hot shower. It was new week. Customers came to the shop like moths drawn to a flame. It was Winter no wonder. Filling a bowl with cereal and breathing it in like it was nothing, Stan got dressed.

New York was still sleeping. For the most part. Cars passing by looked like the Flash himself. 

Grabbing his watch, the Swiss fastened it on his wrist before pocketing his wallet and keys. Grabbing a hoodie and a scarf from his huge wardrobe before locking his door and making his way downstairs. His building had an elevator, Stan rarely taking it. Prefering to stay in shape by taking the stairs. There were a lot. He lived on the 10th floor. Cold air and flocks of snow hit Stans face. 

His coffee shop was located inside the building. The first floor being reserved for just that. The most popular and well known coffee shop in New York. To say that Stan was proud of his shop was an understatement. The keys clicked together as Stan unlocked the door. Switching on the lights. Flooding the street. Since opening the shop 5 years ago Stan hadn't hired one employee. Prefering to manage the shop on his own. It was small. With a standing area and about 6 tables scattered across the room.

Still his shop was the most frequented in the city. People lining up for one of his famous coffee until down the road. Stan would always be amused. He still had about 20 Minutes before he would roll up the blinds. His day always started at 5. He kept the shop open until 2. Most of his customers coming in the morning and at lunch time around 12. Before his shift would start, Stan would prepare himself a coffee. This hour before work was the only time he really had for himself and he had made it a habit to enjoy it.

Truly enjoy it.

The machine whizzed happily when Stan woke it up from it's slumber. Filling it with the freshest brazilian coffee beans he had. Bless Marcelo for providing those for him. The machine went to work immediately. Grounding the beans. Filling the shop with freshly ground coffee. To Stan this was still the best smell. Grabbing his favourite mug from the shelf, Stan placed it under the coffeemaker. Fresh steamy coffee hitting Stans nose and giving him goosebumps.

Taking a sip Stan sighed contently. He could feel the black liquid gold warm his blood and wake him up instanly. Sipping on his mug Stan observed as New York city woke up slowly. People running across the streets. Cabs and cars honking impatiently. White flocks of snow raining down on them and casting the world in whiteness. Glancing on the clock, Stan stretched himself. Depositing his scarf and hoodie behind the counter. Grabbing the apron with "Stan the man" written across it and tieing it behind his back. The shop was warm enough for Stan to wear a simple black t-shirt. 

The clock hit 5. There were already customers waiting outside. Some of them regulars. Some of them were new faces. Stan unlocked the door, changed the sign from closed to open and made his way behind the counter. Customers flooding the shop. For the most part Stan was so flooded with work that he barely had time to interact with his customers. Most of them ordered to go. Stan rarely had customers who really sat down and enjoyed their coffee. Like clockwork Stan prepared each order. Memorizing it in his head.

He really loved this job. 

Between ten and eleven he usually had a breather. Before the second wave, the business men, bankers and other important or not so important people like students would come into the shop. Apart from the usual selection like cold brew, black coffee or cappuccino, Stan had also a daily menu he would change. Some creations would be created in hours some would take him a few days. Stan was very proud of eachone of them. Being a coffee connoisseur Stan liked to experiment.

Apart from the standard coffee and his own daily creation of 3 - 4 specialties he also offered non caffeinated drinks. His besteller apart from coffee was of course hot chocolate. Made with the finest Swiss chocolate which Stan let import from his home country. If he offered hot chocolate he would do it the most authentic way possible. 

His day would usually end at 4pm. The last wave of students and people who returned home after their shift hitting the shop. Not nearly as many as in the morning, which Stan was grateful for. After closing the shop Stan would return to his apartment. Take a hot shower and go to sleep for a few hours. Just so his body got some rest during the day. Waking up before his alarm had become easy. He was doing this job for nearly 10 years. 

The second part would start when New York had started to get dark. The city sleeping. Oblivious to the things Stan would do. His destination was an abandoned garage at the other end of town. It had always been very important to Stan to keep these two jobs as separate he could. The first one was a passion. The second a necessity. Knowing the city like the back of his hand Stan disappeared between the huge skyscrapers. Choosing less frequented, dark streets.

Like a shadow Stan parkoured across the buildings. Maybe he was getting to old for this really. His knee wouldn't thank him for that. It had started to ache during the colder months. His scar itching, Stan ignoring it. Reaching the garage, Stan lifted the door up. The few lamps illuminating the free space. Well it was free space if one didn't look at it properly. No one came here and if they did there were ways to prevent the entrance.

"Look who is finally here, bossman himself. Don't you run on coffee bossman ??"

Nick Kyrgios licked his lips and flicked the toothpick out of his mouth. A few playing card in hand. He was leaning against a wall. His foot resting on upside down wooden fruit box. Stefanos Tsitsipas sitting opposite of him. Also playing cards in hand. Kyrgios had arched and eyebrow in challenge. His boot leaving the box and approaching Stan. Both of them being face to face. Stans eyes were unreadable.

"It's none of your business when I get here Kyrgios. In contrast to you I have a job. Like you said I am the boss and not you."

Nick snorting like an angry bull. Stans face never changing at the challenge. Sometimes he really wanted to punch the Aussie in the face. Clapping that echoed across the whole garage made them turn around.

"Gentlemen please. Lets behave. Nick leave Stanislas alone. He is right. He has a daytime job and we haven't. He is the boss he can show up whenever he wants."

Nick whistled. His face inches from Stans.

"Look your boyfriend has come to your rescue. Why don't you two make out. Oh right you are not interested in him. Breaking his heart over and over again."

Stan growled low in his throat.

"I told you a milliom times to stay out of things you don't understand didn't I Kyrgios ??"

"Stanislas", Nole warned him.

The Serbian grabbing his arm and leading him to the makeshift kitchen. Stan ripped his arm away. Breathing out through his nose. 

"Relax Stanislas. Nick is young we need him. To more important things now though."

Novak was in his personal space. Having pushed Stan against the table. Their chest nearly touching. Novaks hot breath against his face. 

"I missed you Stanislas. Why do you keep leaving me alone."

"Stop that Nole." Stans voice was low in warning. 

"Stop what ??" He asked innocently while touching Stans neck. A shiver running through the Swiss. A very uncomfortable shiver. 

"Don't play dumb Nole. I have told you a million times. Stop."

"You are being too dramatic Stanislas. We are just being friends here."

The Swiss managed to free himself. His friend. His best friend actually looking very disappointed. A noise alerting both of them. Novaks eyes changing immediately. His hand grabbing the knife he had stashed behind his back. Stan grabbing his own from the ankle holster. Both of them ready to attack. 

"For fucks sake Paire. Fognini can't you sneak in without making such a fuss ?? You won't be able to kill anyone like that ?? I hope you went patrolling ?? Did you two drink ?? Someone remind me why I accepted you into this ?? You are good for nothings. How will we take revenge on Nadal if you two keep acting like that. Do you want me to punish you ??"

Novaks voice was threatening. It dropped an octave. His eyes dark. Like a tiger. He growled low in his throat.

"Insolent pack. We are here for a reason."

"Listen crazy shithead we don't have to listen to you."

Fast like a snake, Nole whipped his arm forward. The blade resting on Fogninis throat. It wasn't the blunt side. Nole having a crazy grin on his face.

"Say that again and I will make sure no one will find your body. No one do you understand me."

"Novak." Stan had grabbed Noles arm. The other diffusing like a baloon. Smiling at Stan.

"Yes, darling ??"

Stan wanted to gag. He shook it off.

"Thats enough."

"Of course darling."

No one said a word and Stan massaged his forehead in frustration. It didn't matter how many times he repeated himself. Nole never understood. That was on Stan. He was responsible for his best friend being ill. He should have seen the signs sooner. Now they were in this mess. Nole had grabbed his arm and was stroking it almost affectionately. Stan ripping it away. 

"Gentlemen we are on the hunt tonight. I want Zverev. Baby Zverev am I clear. Not big brother Zverev. Nadal will have made his move already. We can't let them run around our city like that."

Despite Stan being the "boss" Nole was usually the one who suggested their plan of attack. He was the brains. Stan was the brawn. Thats how it always had been. Everything had gone to shit nearly 10 years ago. Stan was no innocent man by no means. The coffee shop was his way trying to cleanse himself from his sins. He had just killed to protect himself. And Nole of course. Those days were in the past.

Since that incident nearly 10 years ago everything had changed. 

At that time Stan couldn't have known that he would have lost his best friend, his brother forever.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noles assault doesn''t go as planned with consequences. Stan makes a discovery.

New Yorks cold, freezing air hit them like a slap in the face. Behind him, Stan could hear teeth clattering. It was most probably Nick. The Australian not being used to New Yorks unforgiving cold. He would probably stary going on a rant, that at this time of a year it was summer in Australia. He would lie on the beach, getting a tan, a cocktail in hand.

"You know", Nick started his teeth clattering violently against eachother, "in Australia it's summer now man. I am freezing my ass off here."

Nole rolled his eyes next to Stan. Breathing out through his nose frustrated. 

"You are such a pussy Kyrgios. It's not that cold. Plus only you would go out in a thin shirt when it's fucking snowing. Go get a jacket or something."

"Shut your mouth Benoit. I am used to Australia."

"We are not in fucking Australia, mate", Fognini said not helping their cause. He was pouring gasoline into fire."

"I am not your, "mate" noodle lover."

"Noodle lover ?? How dare you it's called pasta. No wonder you englishmen have no idea of food."

"I am AUSTRALIAN."

Stan facepalmed himself. Grunts and growls emerging from behind them. They were still moving across New York. Snow falling on to them unforgivingly. If it continued like that they would end up in a snowstorm. Stan wasn't someone to contradict Novak though.

"Do you want me to stop them ??", the Swiss whispered into the Serbs ear.

"I'll do it myself", Nole growled low in his throat. 

Turning around Nole narrowed his eyes dangerously. Fognini and Nick had their foreheads pressed against eachother in challenge. Pushing at eachother. Spewing out insults left and right. Nole separating them by grabbing their collar and pulling them towards himself.

"Enough already. Are you killers or children ?? Don't test my patience I am warning you. I will hide your bodies at the bottom of the ocean. Piece by piece if you fuck this up are we clear ??"

A gust of wind was the only thing that could be heard, it was that eerily quiet. Both Fognini and Nick let go of eachothers collars. Holding Noles gaze. Or at least trying to. Fognini was the first one to break and look at his feet. The Serbs eyes being as cold as the snow surrounding them. Stefanos had hunched his shoulders in both cold and fear. 

"Good boys now kiss and make up we still have work to do", Nole said in the fakest voice immaginable, a crazy grin on his face. Stan feared he would slit all their throats then and there. 

"Scatter", he barked to divert Novaks attention from them. The crazier his friend got the more unpredictable he got. Which would do none of them any good. Stan had to know. This time everyone listened to him all of them disappeared into the night. Leaving only Stan and Nole in between Skyscrapers and snow. 

Nole turnes around to him. Stan shivered and it wasn't from the cold. His friend had this gaze in his eyes. 

"Don't even think about it, Nole I am warning you."

"I am not thinking anything, darling", the Serb whispered against his lips. His breath hot. His eyes dark. Stan growled and Nole backed off. At least something. A sigh of relief escaping the Swiss' lips.

"Remember we are still on a mission."

"Of course, darling", Nole sing songed while they walked through New York. Leaving imprints on the snow. Otherwise they remained silent until Stan caught a fast shadow out of the corner of his eye. Looking at Nole he noticed that the Serb has seen it too.

"Let the hunt begin."

Stan sighed at his friend being overly dramatic. Still he remained silent as him and Nole chased after the shadow. The Swiss' armt boots allowing for some footing on the slippery snow. Who knew if Nick and the others had found Sascha. Their target zigzaged across the buildings. The pain in Stans knee made itself noticable. He wasn't the one for running. Not anymore. Nole shot him a look. 

"Your knee ??" There was a hint of worry in his voice.

"I am fine" Stan answered through gritted teeth, "I'll try to catch him through the roofs."

"Stanislas ?? Be careful."

Stan nodded and took a sharp right turn. Nole could take care of himself. Or thats what Stan had hoped. The hooded figure moving incredibly fast. For that stature it felt like they were the Flash. A sharp pain shot through Stans knee and he stopped for a split second. A dead end also making his target stop. There was barely any light and Stan couldn't make anyone out.

The other turned around and lowered his hood.

"Don't let them take Sascha." 

With that the other sprinted past him, Stan still trying to regain his breathing. The snow had gotten worse. Thick flocks of snow landing on Stans eyelashes. They shouldn't be here not with this weather conditions. God damnit Nole. The Swiss looked around himself. The streets were empty. The only noise was the buzzing of the street lamp. Slowly Stan made his way back. His blood freezing in his veins when he heard someone scream.

Nole.

Ignoring the pain in his knee Stan ran as fast as he could. He knew he would regret this later. It didn't matter for now. Nole was kneeling in the snow. Holding his face. Something was running down his arm. The Serb hiding his face in his hands. When Stan approached him, he was rocking himself and muttering something.

"Nole ?? Nole ?? Novak."

Stan shook his friends shoulders energetically. The Serbs eyes looking into his. They were looking through him. Wide in fear. There was blood dripping down his nose and arm. 

"Stanislas ??" His voice was full of fear. "There is blood. So much blood. Make it stop Stanislas. Stop. Blood. Blood. So much. Make it stop…"

Nole was hugging himself in an attempt to calm himself. His eyes hollow. Glued to the ground. The white snow was painted red and Nole screamed. Stan grabbed his arm, hauling him up.

"Make it stop. Make it stop. Stop. Stanislas. Stanislas please don't leave me. Please. Please…"

Stan held his friend pressed to his side in an attempt to ground him. It was no use to try to talk to him now. He was somewhere else. Stan had to clean him up and put him to bed. This was the only thing that could help now. It was no use asking Nole what had happened he was in trance. The blood having triggered an event that had happened 10 years ago. 

Nick and the others gathered around them like vultures. Feeding off Noles vulnerability. The Serb didn't speak nor did he look up. He hung at Stans side limply. Letting himself be dragged around like a ragdoll, clearly in shock. He was no use to anyone in this state. It was better going home.

"We are done for tonight. We are going back."

Nick snorted.

"But we haven't found baby Zverev. He will be mad."

"Next time", Stan whispered. 

Thankfully Nick remained silent. Neither asking about Nole nor Sascha, which Stan was incredibly thankful for. He had absolutely no strength to answer any questions. 

"Is bossman alright ??", Stefanos sounded mildly worried.

"He will be. He needs to sleep it off. No going hunting for a few days. He will probably sleep for 2-3 days. If any of you try anything on your own you will feel his wrath."

As soon as they reached the garage Stan proceeded to lay Nole in his bed. The other curling around himself like a small child. The Swiss drapping a blanket around his friends shoulders. Getting up. Thats when Nole moved. Or rather his eyes moved. Upwards. Looking into Stan. The warmth of the garage having melted the snow on his coat and creating a puddle around him. 

"Please don't turn off the light. I am scared Stanislas. You know I am afraid of the dark. Please it's so dark. Please don't leave me alone. You are the only one I have left. Please." 

The Swiss sighed and opened a cabinet before returning to Noles side. Giving him the thing he had gotten out. The other grabbing it and pressing it to his chest. Stan had crouched down and against his better judgement petted Noles hair. The other sighing. Pressing the pink bunny plush Stan had given him to his chest. 

"I am afraid of the dark. Please stay until I have fallen asleep."

"Mister Snuggles will protect you."

"Please", Noles voice was small and scared. 

Stan sighed and plopped down on to the floor. The tension in Noles shoulders leaving. He fell asleep after a while. Stan sighing and shutting his door with soft click. If he would have acted soon, Nole wouldn't be in such a state. He couldn't have know what that incident 10 years ago would do to his friend. 

Despite everything Nole was still his friend. His brother. 

None of the others dared to say a thing although Nick opened his mouth but with an ice cold look, Stan made him shut up. 

"Go to sleep all of you. Or do whatever you want but stay out of things for a few days. I will check in daily. If any of you bother him I will dump you in the ocean personally. Are we clear ??"

"Yes boss."

With that Stan braved the cold bitter world that was New York. He was incredibly tired. It was 1am in the morning. This meant barely any sleep for him. Thats why he had his trusty coffee anyway. Since Nole was out Stan didn't have to worry about the night job for a while. Upon getting home he Swiss fell into bed like a wet sack of potatos. Not even bothering to kick off his boots. 

The next days passed by in a blur. Stan had the feeling the coffee shop was even fuller than usual. Maybe he was getting old. The Swiss working like clockwork. Scribbling orders on paper. Making coffee. Changing filters and beans. Nothing too unusual. Except for a very soft sounding voice. 

"Hi."

Stan was working on a coffee order at that time.

"What can you recommend ??"

While handling an espresso, a chai latte and a hot chocolate at once, Stan had no time to turn around and answer the customer himself. Instead he pointed to the chalkboard next to the regular orders. Maybe the guy wanted to try a daily thing ?? Stan had no idea.

"Surprise me then ?? No stress I have time."

Without looking up Stan finished his orders. Since it was winter he opted for a peppermint latte macchiato with marshmallows and chocolate shavings. The voice praising him. The creating wasn't on the menu yet but hey the guy had said to surprise him right ??

"Wow this is good. Now I understand why everyone says "WWRNKS" is the best coffee shop in New York. This is fantastic. I gotta go. Thanks. But you got yourself a regular."

The guy was long gone when Stan looked up. But he had left a tip. Which Stan put into a jar to donate at the end of the year to a homeless shelter. The snow hadn't stopped when Stan washed the floor to get rid of the muddy footprints. He would go check up on Nole again. 

His friends state hadn't gotten better. Stan staying there for a few hours. Reading to his friend who just listened to him. Having reverted back to a child. Sometimes it was hard but the Swiss couldn't abandon him. Not like that. So he suffered in silence. 

The nice voice from the other day ordered the peppermint latte again the next day. Trying to hold some small talk but Stan was way too busy. Way too busy. He would have loved to chat but customers came in seeking warmth from the unforgiving cold. Their routine stayed like that even after Nole had recovered well enough. None saying a word to that. 

After two weeks the mysterious voice turned up at another time. Not that Stan had gotten worried when he hadn't heard the order at exactly 9:27am. He hadn't been worried at all. It had just been a customer.

"Hi. The usual please."

This time Stan had time to look up. The stranger had sat his laptop on the table. His scarf was in his hand and he was smiling at Stan. 

The Swiss nearly letting the glass fall.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stan and the stranger have nice conversations over different cups of coffees.

At the last moment Stan caught himself and the glass, setting it on the counter carefully. The strangers smile never faltered while Stan cleared his very desert like dry throat. What the hell ?? The guy looked gorgeus. Stan was sure he was drooling when he remembered the strangers request. Right the coffee. It was calming operating his coffee machines. Hearing them whizz happily. Stans heart was in his throat. The guy had such a nice voice and a face.

Stop that you are being a creep, he scolded himself.

Making coffees was freeing. Stan sat the coffee on the counter. The stranger smiling at him and leaving him a tip as always. His laptop was connected to his camera. Pictures of New York being shown. The Swiss had tried not to pry but the strangers eyes met his. They weren't angry just curious. Stan ducked his head, trying to hide his blush.

"So this is the famous WWRNKS" I have been referred to this shop. I had imagined it to be bigger though. They didn't lie when they said it was the best coffee shop in New York. I have to praise you on that really. I have never had such a good coffee in my life."

"Thanks I appreciate that."

"I have to admit I got a bit worried when you didn't show up at your usual time."

The strangers eyebrows quirked upwards in surprise.

"You never looked at me and still you know when I would come to your shop ??"

Stan ducked his head again. 

"I reconized you by your voice. Usually I don't have a lot of time to chat with my customers. I have a breather between 10 and 11 though. I don't mean to pry but you are a photographer ??"

The stranger looked up from his coffee and smiled. 

"Ah yes I am currently on a tour through North America. I am a freelance photographer. I usually am interested in nature and buildings. People have been talking and praising your shop so much I had to try your coffee for myself. It's the best I have ever had."

Stan laughed gently. 

"Oh my God where are my manners. My name is Grigor. Pleased to meet you."

Grigor huh. So the Adonis had a name. Stans legs felt like jelly. He had such a nice voice damn. Grigor held out his hand and Stan shook it.

"I am Stan. Welcome to New York and my humble coffee shop "WWRNKS" I hope you will continue to like my coffee. I will let you continue your work now."

Grigor laughed gently. Picking up his coffee and nodding at Stan. Nearly moaning at the taste. Such a good coffee. The best he had ever had in his life. The Swiss turned around and washed mugs that didn't need to be washed but he knew it would be rude if he started staring at Grigor. The other sipping on his coffee, the keys on his laptop clicking together.

Stan was so relieved when another customer entered his coffee shop, so he didn't need to look at Grigor. The Swiss had never really had times for relationships. Of course people would flirt with him. Women and men alike. If he wouldn't he a crime boss maybe Stan would have considered going out with some of them. When Noles state had worsened, Stan had put a lot of his power into helping him.

Only to find out that his friend couldn't be helped anymore.

Stan had pushed everything back. His own happiness. His own health. The coffee shop was the only thing that was truly his. He had managed to keep everything away from it. In the back of his head, Stan knew he deserved happiness too. Sometimes there was doubt in his mind. That he didn't deserve happiness for having failed to save his friend. 

With a sigh Stan continued to wipe the tables. Just to keep them shiny. Barely anyone stopped by to enjoy a coffee anymore. People were always in a hurry. The Swiss understood. He really did. Work. Family. Errands. Still one should be able to enjoy a coffee on peace like Grigor. Who Stan was definitely not drooling over thank you very much. The guy was probably not even interested in him anyway. 

Stan was probably too old for him.

"Say do you know any good places where I could eat ?? I will be in New York for a while anyway."

Stan rounded the counter and grabbed a chair, turning it around and sitting on it so his folded arms rested on top of the chair. 

"It depends what you are searching for really."

"What is your favourite place to go to ??"

Stan chuckled amused. 

"Like I said it depends what you are searching for. If you want breakfast you have to go to "Le petit etoile" it's across the street. Best bread and pastries in the city. Trust me I know the boys personally you won't regret it. I can't really help you out with lunch since I barely have time for that to be honest but I know a few spots for dinner. It also depends what you are searching for."

Grigor was biting his lower lip, he had put his finger under his chin and was thinking.

"I mean of you are free one evening we could go out together ?? I really don't know anyone in the city. I didn't even prepare myself. Well I did I know what I need to photograph and stuff but other than that."

Grigor was rubbing the back of his neck embarrassed.

"Or I can cook for you ??"

As soon as those words left his mouth Stan wanted to take them back. You stupid fool he scolded himself. Shut up. Don't be a creep. The guy is nice and you are ruining the moment.

"Oh you cook ??" Grigor sounded surprised.

"Sorry ignore what I just said. I can give you a list of places no problem. Just let me get my list yes ??"

Grigor grabbed his arm and suddenly it felt like the shop had added a few degrees. Stan uncurled it. His skin burning.

"Sorry about that", Grigors ears were a shade of red.

"I'll make you another coffee. Any wishes ??"

Making coffee relaxed him. Thats what he needed right now. Fuck the guy was hot. So hot. Stop it stupid. There is no way he is interested in you. You are a killer remember ?? 

"Surprise me. I am sure I will like anything you make."

Stan nodded. His heart beating in his throat. He grabbed the almond milk and poured it in a glass. Adding vanilla extract and some chocolate syrup. Half a cup of freshly brewed espresso. Milk foam and ground up coffee beans on top. He placed it on a counted with a spoon and straw for Grigor to taste. 

"So all those daily creations are all yours right ??"

"Yes. I test all of them myself first before offering them to the public. They are half price while they are on the chalkboard. Lets say it's a testing phase. If people like them and give me positive feedback I take them into the premanent menu. Of course not all dailies are new creations. If I want customer feedback there is a jar so they can write their favourite drink and throw it in there."

Stan shrugged. He really liked to get his customers involved into his passion.

"Do you like this one ??"

Grigor smiled widly and Stan could feel his legs shake. Thank God he was behind the counter so the other didn't see him. 

"Well it seems I will have to come and visit you everyday and try all of your daily creations then. This one is delicious. Is it on the menu already ??"

"No. I just created this one on the spot."

For you, which Stan doesn't say obviously. He is not a love struck puppy. Stan didn't want to judge anyone but he would need to perform a background check on the guy. God damnit he was getting as paranoid as Nole now. Let Lady Fate handle this he told himself. Allow yourself to enjoy something. Stan nodded, more to himself than Grigor. 

"It would be nice if you would come by. I am pretty lonely most of the time. Don't get me wrong I really love my job but people are always so hectic. No one has time to enjoy a coffee in peace you know. Thats why I opened this shop in the first place."

They chatted for a while longer. Grigor eager to know about the city. 

"Oh you play the guitar ?? Thats so cool."

Stan nearly let the mug he was cleaning fall. The ebony colored guitar hung opposite to the door. It greeted Stan everytime he entered. Mocking him. Still the Swiss couldn't take it off and stash it somewhere. It was the only thing he had left. From the real Nole. His friend had gifted him the guitar when he had turned 18. It had been on display in the shop since Stan had opened it. 

"Do you play ??" Grigor sounded excited. 

"Sorry. I used to. But I don't anymore. My best friend gifted me the guitar."

"Oh. I am sorry."

Stan shook his head. He had made it sound as if Nole was dead. He wasn't. Well the real Nole, his best friend, his brother that Nole was gone. He had been gone for about 10 years. Stan was left with picking up the pieces. But Nole couldn't be saved anymore.

Grigor had kept him company until Stan had to close the shop. Which had been nice for a change really. After bidding his goodbye Stan made his way to downtown to the garage. He had to check on the others. And on Novak. His best friend was probably in the state he had left him in. Upon entering the garage the others didn't even blink at him.

Stan sat on the chair to the opposite of Noles bed. 

"Hey there buddy I brought you hot chocolate. I'll leave it here. I know you will like it."

Noles eyes were hollow. He was still clutching mister Snuggles. Stan stayed for while. He had felt as if he had abandoned his best friend. Grigor had been so nice. Distracting him from his worries. With Nole in this state all of them had a breather. In a sense. After 2 hours Stan returned home. The snowstorm not showing any signs of stopping. 

The Swiss looked forward to see Grigor tomorrow. He hoped he hadn't scared the other away. With that he allowed himself to rest a bit. Grigor showed up at exaclty 10 the next morning. Thats what Stan had hoped for really.

"Good morning Stan", he said cheerily. A smile on his face which made Stans legs shake. He didn't know why that guy had such an effect on him. This time he placed the laptop on the counter. 

"I really like watching you do your magic you know. Surprise me."

Stan went to work. Mixing stuff together. Toasted hazelnuts. Brown sugar. Caramel syrup. Fresh columbian coffee. Like the other times Grigor sighed happily. 

"You know if you keep going like that I might have to ask you out on a date. This stuff is unreal."

Stans head was redder than a tomato and he coughed to clear his throat. Oh Grigor was flirting with him. The other gave him a wink and Stan sighed. The bell above the door rang when it was opened. A young, lanky man clad in white entering the café. His black hair was sprinkled with white powder. His nose was also white. In his arms he held a box.

"Bonjour Stan."

"Ah bonjour Pierre."

"Nico send me to give you our newest samples to test."

The young man set the box on the counter. Pieces of cake and pastry being scattered all over the box. There was also bread. 

"Grigor this is Pierre. He is the patisserie master of Le petit etoile. His boyfriend Nico is the breadmaker. This stuff is unreal. They also have cookies. You have to try those seriously. They are unreal."

Trusting Stans judgement Grigor tried a pastry and moaned in delight. Oh my God. He had never tasted such good pastries in his life.

"Merci Pierre. Greet Nico for me. And tell him to come visit. The coffee is on me."

Pierre nodded and Stan watched the younger cross the street. 

"Oh they are your friends ??"

"Yeah really nice guys. I am just asking myself when Nico will finally propose. Those guys have the shop together for nearly as long as I have my coffee shop. They are very very sweet."

A routine started between both of them. Grigor would show up at 10. Stan would make him a coffee. Keep him company. They would chat about everything and nothing. It was nice. Not being alone. It was nearly Christmas when Grigor asked him for a favor.

"You know can I maybe have a photoshoot with you. Not now, next year maybe. I had a client but he said he can't make it and I don't think I will be able to find a replacement that fast."

And I don't want to, Grigor thought.

"I can offer you dinner with me if you'd like ??"

"How about I cook for us here instead of going out ??" Stan asked. God damnit where did he get that confidence ??

The tips of Grigors ears heated up but he nodded. Smiling widly.

"Sure I'd love to."


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stan definitely is not about to have a date with one of his clients. Nope.

The week before Christmas was always the most hectic one for Stan. It was by far the most busy one. His small humble shop would be crowded with people. Some customers and some just people seeking shelter from the unforgiving cold and snow. The snowstorm showing no signs of dying down. The weatherforcast saying the same. With the amount of people that come to his shop daily, Stan could have had a bigger shop. Maybe convert the first floor into another shop.

For now the shop was ok. Stan was still thinking about expanding if he was honest. He wouldn't be a criminal forever. Thats what he hoped at least. Coffee and coffeemaking being his true passion. But there was Nole. Nole who had to be taken care of. His friend had recovered, planning their next attack. Luckily Stan had been able to convince him to wait until the new year. It would be a suicide mission to go out in that cold. He didn't have a deathwish, thank you very much. 

Grigor had come by everyday to spend time with him. Punctual as ever, Stan was very grateful for the company if he was honest. It's not like the guys talked a lot or anything. Frankly Stan wasn't interested in any of their opinions if he was honest. 

"Hello best coffeemaker in New York City. How are you doing today ??"

Stan smiled for the first time that day. His heart doing happy flips in his chest. Seeing and talking to Grigor had become the best past of his day if he was honest. It disconnected him from his worries. From Nole. From his double life, which Grigor could not know about. No matter what. Stan chuckled bitterly. It was not like Grigor was his boyfriend or anything. He was just a client. An acquaintance at the most. 

He was no friend and certainly not his lover or God forbid his boyfriend or anything. Although the Swiss had wished they'd be something. 

"Stan you ok ??"

Snapping out of his thoughts Stan shook his head. 

"Sorry there has been so much going on today. I am just a bit tired really."

Grigor looked at him concerned. His eyebrows frowning in worry.

"You need a break", he announced.

Stan sighed softly but didn't contradict him. Grigor patting the stool next to him. Defeated Stan plopped down, the other had opened his laptop. Pushing it in Stans field of vision and both of them looked at the pictures together for a while. Most customers had cleared when Grigor had come into the shop. It had been a very hectic morning.

"Have you ever thought of hiring someone to help you ??"

Stan had prepared both of them some hot chocolate. With whipped cream, chocolate shavings and hazelnuts on top. Warming their cold hands on the warm mug. 

"I like to work alone. This is my shop. I am very proud of it."

"Doesn't mean you have to do everything on your own. You can get some help. A helping hand isn't bad."

It felt like lightning had struck him. The things Grigor was saying reminding him of Nole. Painful memories. Squeezing his eyes shut Stan shook his head. Not now, please.

"I can still manage but thanks I will think about it. If this snow stops that is."

Grigor laughed softly. Stans heart doing flips in his chest. This guy was dangerous. He was making him feel things. The Swiss had never wanted to be in a gang, he had been pulled in and the guilt of not being able to save Nole had destroyed him. He had just joined to keep an eye on his friend. Make sure he was safe. 

He wasn't. His head being his own enemy. Stan had tried everything in his power. Nothing had helped. 

"You know I usually like the snow. Being Swiss and all but this is just freezing coldness. I'd rather stay cuddled up in my bed all day. Maybe watch some movies or so."

"Europe wasn't this cold either. At home in Bulagaria I don't recall it being so cold and France hasn't either. But it will make for some amazing photos."

"You want to go out in that freezing cold again ??" Stan tried not to sound worried and he was sure he was sounding worried.

"I am not the one with the red nose, Mister red nosed reindeer. It's cute though."

Grigor winked at him and Stan was sure he was redder than a tomato. So Grigor was really flirting with him huh ?? It was nice, Stan wasn't denying that but he was sure there were other, better guys than him for someone like Grigor. 

Both of them spend the day in the shop. Grigor waving goodbye and leaving. White clouds of air escaped Stans mouth. He should have been used to the cold but it had gotten colder than usual. The Swiss watched the other disappear in a cab. Stuffing his hands in his pants he made his way towards the garage. The snowstorm making it difficult to see. Nole had texted him and request him specifically.

Stan was half frozen when he finally arrived that the garage. If he was honest he wanted to curl in his bed, thank you very much. 

"Stanislas you are finally here. Oh my God baby you are frozen."

Stan rolled his eyes annoyed. Swallowing down the urge to tell Nole to stop calling him that. However he had no strenght and he let his friend help him out of his coat. Yanking his arm away when the Serb in his personal space. Nick was snickering in the background, Stan sending him a death glare.

"We have to talk Novak."

"Of course darling."

Stan massaged his temples in frustration, Nole leading them to his "office" and closing the door behind him.

"You wanted to talk darling", he purred in Stans ear, making the other shiver uncomfortably.

"Lets just not go after Rafa and the others."

Noles eyes changed. His face becoming unreabable. Years ago had been able to read his friend, now since the illness had taken over his brain Nole had become robot like. To Stan it felt like his friend wasn't human anymore. 

"At least until the new year. The storm is getting worse Nole. I don't think Rafa would want his people to freeze to death. They won't come out. Lets wait. A little bit until the storm stops. Please."

Noles eyes changed again. They were almost soft. Lovingly he grabbed Stans chin and stroked it. Nodding at his request.

"You are right darling. Fine we will wait until the new year."

Stans skin was burning under Noles hold. His fingera digging almost painful into his skin. The hold was strong even though the Swiss tried to move his head away. There was no way for him to escape. Noles face came closer and Stans blood froze in his veins.

"Stop that", he whispered through clenched teeth.

"What was that darling ??", Nole feigned innocent his eyes sparkling. A crazy grin on his face. 

"Stop. That."

Stan growled dangerously. He didn't want to hurt his friend ok. He should have protected him. It was his fault alone he was in this state.

You deserve this Stanislas, his head mocked him cruelly.

Nole stopped. Immediately. Stans mouth leaving out a shuddering breath. His whole body was shaking. 

"I am leaving now", he announced unnecessarily. 

Standing up his legs felt like jelly. Nole didn't follow him. Thankfully. But he was greeted with another sight. Nick leaning against the wall behind the door. His arms crossed over his chest. A disapproving scowl on his face.

"Man you really have nerves to deny him what he wants. You are sick man really. He just wants love. What kind of best friend are you anyway. Look at him."

Yeah look at him, Stan thought bitterly, look at him…

"A best friend shouldn't take advantage of his friends mental health. I am doing what is best for him. And you. You are doing even more damage with your fucked up shit you keep telling him. Leave him alone."

"Such a good friend you are Wawrinka. Just help him. Love him."

"Fuck off Kyrgios before I cut your head off. Don't test me. I won't take advantage of him. I don't love him. It wouldn't be fair to either of us. Now leave."

Nick grunted but left. Stans shoulders sagging. He was very tired right now. Mentally and physically. The thought of seeing Grigor tomorrow made him feel better. Wrapping his scarf over his nose and mouth and buttoning up his coat Stan left the garage. Sadness flooding his mind. He wanted to help Nole so bad.

His friend had rejected every kind of help. 

Lost in thought Stan didn't notice that someone was following him. No one except Nole knew where his coffee shop was located. The others always staying in downtown. His shop was in uptown. The snow casting the world in silence helped Stan notice things better. Faster. Someone was following him. He knew New York like the back of his hand. 

With a swift movement he disappeared behind a building. The shadows helping him blend in. Rafa wouldn't send out his people like that so who were they ?? Making sure Stan was alone he started climbing on top of a ladder to get to the rooftops. New York was as beautiful as ever. Crouching down Stan watched the people who were following him disappear. Weird. Making sure they were gone the Swiss jumped down again. His knee protesting.

The streets were clear and Stan hurried home. Thats what he had thought. Something or someone hit him. Stan not being able to react fast enough. Looking up Stan growled.

"What the fuck do you think you are doing Kyrgios you fucker."

"Nole was very disappointed."

"So what now you have to play his protector ?? You want to get into his pants ??"

"Maybe."

Stan narrowed his eyes dangerously. His hand connecting with the Australians throat. Pushing him against a wall and squeezing.

"Listen to me you little piece of shit. If you take advantage of him I will cut you into pieces. If I see you touching him I will cut off your hand."

"Oh and you said you don't like him. Look at you being jealous bossman."

"LEAVE. And hands off, of Nole I am warning you. Consider yourself lucky I didn't kill you here and now."

Nick left, Stan releasing a shuddering breath. His cheek was bloody and his head was spinning. He hadn't even registered having hit a wall. Now he had to worry about Nole even more. God damnit. Nick that bastard. Stan went home, his head feeling heavy he fell into an unrestful sleep. 

The Swiss woke up with Grigors face and voice in his mind. Fuck he had dreamt of him. Again. His body reacting naturally and Stan stumbled to the shower. He needed an ice cold one. His head wasn't feeling better so Stan stumbled to bed again. Sleeping the whole day until his alarm rang at 5 in the morning. 

A nasty bruise had formed on the spot Nick had hit. That bastard and his damn rings. Inspecting the damage Stan sighed. He would need to cover that up. Somehow. Or not. Due to the snowstorm worsening there were barley any customers. 

Like clockwork Grigor greeted him at 10, Stan pretending to wash some mugs so Grigor wouldn't see his face and the injury. He would see at some point. Still Stan tried to hide it as long as possible. Glancing behind his shoulder, Stan saw Grigor set up his laptop. 

"Oh hi- wait what happened to your face ?? Oh my God are you alright ?? I was worried when you didn't open the shop yesterday."

Stan waved him off.

"I was mugged yesterday. Don't worry."

"Mugged ?!?!"

"I am fine."

"Do you have ice packs ??"

Stan nodded confused.

"Hand me one please and a cloth."

Stan did what he was told. Watching Grigor work. Before the ice pack was pressed against his cheek. It should have surprised Stan how easily the lie slipped off his lips. It didn't. Half of the things he told Grigor were lies. The Swiss felt incredibly bad.

"Sorry I made you worry."

"Lets exchange phone numbers. Just in case. And for the photoshoot. Although I think I found someone. I was really worried though. Maybe you should go to the doc. We can go together."

"I am fine Grigor I swear. Here your coffee."

Grigor sighed. 

Their routine picked up where it had left off. A week after New Year, Grigor was sitting in his coffee shop. Working on his picture when he got a phone call. Stan trying not to pry and listen to anything.

"What you can't make it ?? But I already booked the location. I can't cancel like that. Where should I find someone else this quick ?? The photoshoot is in a few hours. Yes I understand. Thanks."

When Stan turned around Grigor looked like he was about to cry. Running a hand across his face tiredly.

"Everything ok ??" Of course not Stan but you had to ask anyway.

"My client cancelled at the last moment. The location is booked and I don't know what to do. I mean technically it would just be for fun but I would need the photos if it is ok with you ??"

Grigor had his face in his hands and was shaking his head.

"If the offer from the last time is still on the table I would like to help you out, but only if we have dinner together sometime ??"

Grigors face broke in relief.

"Thank you so much. Of course we can go eat out together. You offered to show me some places anyway."

Stan blushed crimson. He saw Grigor scribble something on a piece of paper before handing it to him.

"In two hours at this place. Room number and everything is noted. So you have some time to shower and stuff. Thank you so much again. I will see you soon."

Stan looked at the paper. His heart beating in his throat.

There you have your date Stanislas.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The photoshoot takes an unexpected turn of events or does it ??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written by the very talented zsab1016. Thank you so much for helping me out with this one bro. Love you. ❤❤❤ Be sure to check out her works and send her love. ❤❤❤

So here they were, in this ridiculously expensive luxury hotel suite in Brooklyn with a floor to ceiling window front overlooking the Hudson river and the famous skyline of Manhattan. Stan must admit the view was incredible. He spent most of his time roaming the streets of Manhattan so seeing his hood from another perspective was astonishing.

"Would you like a drink?", Grigor's voice drew Stan out of his thoughts.

"Sure. Whatever you have is fine with me."

Grigor smiled at him and took two bottles of beer out of the minibar of which he handed one to Stan.

"I was a bit scared you'd ever only drink coffee. And maybe hot chocolate. To a good shooting. Cheers!" He raised his bottle grinning to clink it with Stan's.

They both stood there gazing out the window while sipping on their beers in comfortable silence. It was a very clear and brisk winter day. The sun slowly started setting. The perfect lighting for the intended shoot.

"Ok, I guess we have to get going or else the light will be gone," Grigor announced and adjusted his equipment. "Actually, do you mind if I turn on the TV? There is this tennis match I really wanna watch and since this is no real job anymore…"

Stan chuckled at this. So the guy liked tennis? Stan had no clue about tennis but fine. He wouldn't mind if Grigor was a little distracted by something so he wouldn't focus entirely on Stan's non-existent model skills. He was a little nervous indeed. Why on earth did he agree to do that again?

"Go ahead, I don't mind."

"Thanks, man." Grigor flashed him his irresistible smile and ah, yes, this had made Stan say yes to all of this in the first place.

Grigor selected the sports channel and squinted his eyes at the small display of the current score in the bottom left corner. Then he gave a content hum and turned to take his place behind the camera.

"Ok, Stan, let's go. Let's just take some casual shots so we both get a feeling for the other and to check out the effect of the light before we start properly," Grigor suggested and turned into work-mode.

Stan unwrapped his scarf and discarded it with his jacket onto the sofa facing the TV. He shot a quick glance at the tennis match.

"Who is playing?"

Not that the answer would help him in any way other than trying to distract Grigor from the fact that his hands were sweaty and shaky and he was super nervous and didn't know how to act in front of a camera at all.

"It's Murray versus Shapovalov," Grigor provided the inquired information without looking up from his camera, busy selecting the right settings.

When Stan finally stood in front of the window front Grigor took the first snaps and checked the result on the small screen on the camera. He adjusted some things and took some more.

"Perfect," he exclaimed, finally looking up from behind his tool again. "Now, well… How do I explain that?"

Stan saw the frown on the other's face and decided to help him out.

"Just spill it. Can't be that bad, can it?"

Grigor ran a nervous hand through his short, dark hair and with a sense of shame explained, "Ok, so this was supposed to be an erotic shoot. I mean, of course you don't have to undress. But if you did, you know, I wouldn't exactly mind."

Excuse you? Stan almost choked on his own spit but regained his composure just in time.

"Alright, let me finish my beer."

Stan strode over to the small table where he had left his half emptied bottle and gulped down the rest in seconds.

Grigor was still fearing Stan's reaction but he had a feeling it's all or nothing with his handsome barista. And to his surprise, it didn't need more conviction.

"Ok, I'll do it. I'm sure you're professional enough to guide me through this and get some ok looking shots…"

Grigor unconsciously licked his own lips in anticipation, a smile already forming again.

"… but, what do I get in return?"

Now it was Stan smirking, feeling his confidence growing. Grigor seemed to contemplate his options. When he didn't give an answer straight away Stan almost considered negotiating anew. That's when the younger man proposed a deal.

"I have an idea. You choose a player. For every point he scores I'll lose one piece of clothing. For every point scored by the other you're taking one off. How about that?"

They both stood there, looking at each other with a challenging smile.

Then Stan took a look at the TV to check the current score although he had no idea what it meant. So he just picked his player randomly.

"Ok, I'll go with the Shalovalo guy," he announced.

Grigor, intrigued by the mispronunciation and positive that he'd have the better pick with Murray, given he was leading 6-4, 4-3, happily agreed to go with Murray then and they started the shoot.

Grigor tried not to be too excited when Murray pulled off a perfect service game and Stan had already taken off his boots and socks within the next two minutes.

He had to concentrate very hard to give Stan directions on how to pose and taking nice shots when every other second another point was scored. Shapovalov didn't do too bad in his service game either which also left Grigor with no shoes and socks instantly. Murray managed one point in this which meant he had Stan down to his black jeans and t-shirt already, allowing himself to think about what was waiting underneath.

There was a break in the tennis match which also meant a break for Stan getting rid of his clothes too fast and breathe. He had never thought that modelling would be so hard. When the umpire called time he hoped for his guy to score some points next in order to not be the first to be standing there completely naked.

And as if he'd heard his pleas, the guy had stepped up somehow which meant he took the next two points of Murray as well as the purple sweater and white t-shirt off of Grigor.

Jesus, what a sight. Stan was speechless and forgot to breathe for a moment and Grigor visibly enjoyed the effect he had on the Swiss. He felt his gaze lingering on his body when he casually resumed giving instructions. When Stan still didn't move he looked up behind his camera.

"Like what you see?"

God, he was such a tease. Stan finally gained his voice back.

"Why would you hide behind the camera with a six pack like that?"

Grigor couldn't help grinning. That's when Murray scored again.

"Off!" He pointed at Stan's t-shirt, ignoring the question.

"You're enjoying this way too much," Stan stated while pulling his t-shirt over his head slowly, exposing his equally ripped stomach to the other.

Now it was Grigor's turn to stare. He almost dropped his camera and could only hope he wasn't gaping the way he felt he was when he opened his mouth to say something but the words got stuck.

Stan gave him a moment to compose himself when he threw the t-shirt onto the sofa to his other clothes and ran his fingers through his blond strands of hair to put them back in order.

"Speak for yourself. Why would you hide behind a coffee machine with a body like that?" Grigor managed some coherent words at last. "Is there something I should know?" He added with a playful smile.

Stan laughed internally and bit his tongue to not give away anything he might regret. Now wasn't the time.

"Come on, let's continue the shoot," Stan proposed to solve a bit of the not so unpleasant tension which has built up inevitably over the last few minutes.

"Alright, ok. So the light is gone… how about… let me just…" Grigor wandered around the room looking for a good spot to place Stan in (and give himself some room to cool down) and tried some different stages of dimming the light.

"Yeah, I guess that will do. Ok, Stan, would you mind moving over here?" Grigor pulled one of the fancy chairs in front of a navy coloured wall, illuminated by the ceiling spots directed at it.

Stan did as he was told and sat down on the chair leaning back, trying to look sexy and relaxed. Just that he was anything but relaxed at this moment.

"Wow. Brilliant. Just stay like this!" Grigor praised, enjoying himself behind and the model in front of the camera.

"Alright, Stan. I'm afraid it's time you lose those pants," Grigor announced without really thinking about the phrasing of his words. Or maybe he did.

"Jesus!"

"Grigor."

"What?"

"Just Grigor is fine."

Grigor couldn't hide a smirk. The reactions he could draw from this handsome man opposite him drove him to be this bold. When Stan finally opened his belt and discarded his pants seductively, Grigor's thoughts went wild and he gulped hard before uttering his next instructions. Fuck, his own pants were getting unbearably tight and sweat started pooling on his neck from anticipation alone.

Stan moved to sit down again, well aware that they both wouldn't be able to drag this out much longer.

"Ok, now if you just sit a little further on the edge… Great. Lean towards me. Wonderful. And put your elbows on your thighs and give me that look again.

And he gave him that look indeed.

"We're almost done. One last pose, ok? Can you stand up please?"

Grigor was unconsciously chewing his lower lip, trying very hard to concentrate on his job and not the flex of the muscles in Stan's thighs, which Grigor thought were unreal.

Stan did, turning a little to the side but tilting his head towards the camera. The flash went crazy and he heard Grigor muttering something like "this is gonna look awesome in black and white". He almost felt a little dizzy when he hooked a thumb in the waistband of his boxer briefs, running the fingers of his other hand through his hair and parting his lips for what he hoped was his most sexy look. Not that he could've helped it anyway.

Grigor was like in trance behind his camera, trying to catch every smallest move Stan provided, transfixed by the sheer beauty and hotness in front of him. Grigor was openly checking him out now. There was no point in hiding anymore. If it hadn't been clear before where this was going to lead then it was definitely now.

Stan knew that his black boxer briefs didn't leave much room for imagination so he decided he might as well take them off. It was now or never.

And then they were gone.

Wherever Stan gathered the confidence from given his lack of experience, he didn't know, but he was determined to not let it show.

Grigor just stood there glued to the spot, staring unabashedly, licking his lips like a predator.

"God, the things I want you to do to me."

"How about we start with something basic like… this," Stan retorted and closed the distance between them to meet his lips.

A first gentle brush soon became a more demanding pressing but still slow testing of waters. Too afraid to fuck up they both didn't know how to handle the immense heat that created this first soft touch.

When Grigor pulled back, the desire sparkling in his dark brown eyes almost scared Stan but before he could trail off Grigor's plea rang through to him.

"Touch me."

The next thing he noticed was his right palm flat against Grigor's bare chest and his other hand curled around his neck pulling him in for a proper kiss this time. Unconsciously he slipped his tongue into the other man's mouth who had parted his lips for him. It turned out desperate, messy, but the moans filling the air were worth it.

Stan drew back, suddenly aware he was still the only one naked and not being touched back so far.

"What about you? Not going to touch me too?"

Grigor blinked, obviously catching his breath before giving his answer.

"I'm afraid I'll burn my fingers."

"Ugh, shush!" Stan huffed and they both broke into giggles but before it could kill the mood Grigor grabbed his hand.

"Come!"

Stan found himself in the spacious bedroom of the suite, his back hitting the crisp sheets with Grigor hovering over him, smashing their lips together again. Stan was past the point of caring if he was kissing well or whatever, he enjoyed every second of it and god, was he hard and desperate to get his hands on this man's body.

"These need to come off!" He demanded pulling at the fabric still covering the rest of Grigor's skin.

With a low growl Grigor complied and openend his belt to pull down his pants and underwear in one go.

Now it was Stan's turn to give a predatory stare, panting. "Fuck."

"Nothing I'd rather do, Stanley. Is it Stanley?"

Without getting an answer he was pulled down on top of Stan who started kissing him again and finally got to put his hands on the soft, warm skin. They both moaned when they found their way on Grigor's ass and squeezed there eagerly.

Their crotches rubbing together sent jolts of unbearable arousal through both of their bodies and Grigor decided he's waited long enough to take what he needs. Ever since Stan had walked through that hotel room door Grigor was half-hard, glowing with anticipation, hardly able to hold back enough to pull through the seeming eternity of the photoshoot. Not that he hadn't enjoyed the unusual foreplay.

Grigor pressed another short kiss to Stan's lip and sat back on his heels between the other's legs. His own dick in his hand, stroking it slowly, he allowed himself a moment to marvel at the gorgeous man beneath him. His other hand wandered over Stan's stomach and hips down his thighs which Grigor thought were the thickest, strongest and sexiest he had ever seen and been able to lay his hands on. Barely visible in the dim light, but noticable when tracing it with his fingers, he came across a large scar on Stan's knee. Maybe he shouldn't have asked but his mouth often was quicker than his brain and the question was out before he knew it.

"Jesus, what happened there?"

Stan opened his eyes, awoken from his blissful state of enjoying the worship-like touches and cursed his fucking scar for ruining the moment.

"I had an accident with my motorbike a few years ago. It's fine now. Don't worry." He hated the fact he had to feed Grigor yet another lie but there was no way he could tell him the truth. Definitely not now.

"Sorry," Grigor just said with a raspy voice and continued stroking the strong legs, thinking this must be his new kink and what those thighs were able to do.

He half laid on Stan again and resumed kissing him, the sensations this time being stronger than before, more intimate, familiar almost, yet exciting.

"I want you to fuck me, Stan."

Panting they looked at each other, then Stan nodded his consent and Grigor shifted to lay beside him on his back.

Stan had no idea how he was going to survive this without letting Grigor know this was his first time. There was no way he was willing to tell him. You can do this, he thought, trying to remember some porn he's watched ages ago. Grigor must have noticed his hesitation and Stan could only hope he hadn't said anything aloud.

"Hey," Grigor whispered, "I can take care of the preparation if you feel uncomfortable.

Uncomfortable? Before Stan had time to process the implication, Grigor put his fingers to Stan's lips and at least he was smart enough to understand he was asking him to suck. So he did, whirled his tongue around them and released them covered in his spit and watched Grigor rubbing them at his own entrance and eventually pushing one after the other in while fixing his gaze on Stan's blushed face.

"God, Stan, you're so beautiful. Will you please touch me!"

Stan pulled himself out of his mesmerized stare and went to gently stroke Grigor's chest and arms. He didn't dare touch 'there'. And he wouldn't. Not without Grigor asking him to.

"Harder!"

Stan must have given a perplexed look.

"The stroking. Harder. I don't like the tickling," Grigor explained with a crooked smile. He was panting heavily by now, pulling out his fingers and reaching for his pants which he had dropped on the floor beside the bed. He managed to retrieve a condom and a small tube of lube which he passed to Stan.

"You ok? Want a hand?" He nodded at Stan's dick that didn't look like it needed help at all.

"No. No, I'm ok, I think." God, Stan wanted to slap himself for his insecurity. Why the fuck were his hands shaking so much? Composing himself he was determined to not mess this up but make this good for both of them. He grabbed the small square package and ripped it open, fumbling with the condom but somehow he managed to put it on rather smoothly. Good. Good. Finally applying a huge amount of lube he braced himself to give his virginity to the stunning man in front of him who he even after spending hours and hours in his shop together over the past month, he thought, barely knew, but who had now parted his legs in invitation for him. There was no way he was backing up now.

He almost came from the expectant look on Grigor's face, suddenly feeling utterly unprepared and as much as he wished it didn't, it must have been obvious.

"Come here," Grigor said calmly and guided Stan the way. "Take it slow, ok? We have time."

Except that Stan was aroused like a fucking teenager and felt like one even more. Thank god he had this amazing lover by his side who knew how to not make it awkward if he had noticed.

And then somehow everything happened like in a blur. Stan's brain had said goodbye the moment his dick had made contact to Grigor's entrance for the first time. Lead by Grigor's hands he slid in the first centimetres and was overwhelmed by the sensations already. He tried to breathe evenly and to concentrate on his movements but his hips jerked of their own device.

"Woah!" Grigor exclaimed, thinking someone's very eager. But who was he to blame him? He was almost as close to coming from anticipation alone.

Stan pushed in completely now and after Grigor's go he gave in to his natural instinct. Starting out rather messily they soon found a rhythm they both liked. Grigor drew Stan closer, his hands roaming over the strong, broad back of the Swiss and finally down to his ass where he gave each cheek a firm squeeze.

Meanwhile Stan was lost in the sensations. His skin was tingly all over, the parts where their bodies were meeting felt like igniting a fire any second.

"More! Harder! Stan, please!"

God, this man was killing him.

"Harder, please, I need you to fuck me harder."

Stan let out a long groan. Was he ever going to shut up? Shit, he needed him to shut the fuck up or this would be over way too soon. Stan tried his best to grant Grigor his wish. He had never thought that words would turn him on so much. He blamed it on the barely noticable Bulgarian accent. And his voice.

"Yes, yes, oh my god, Stan!" Grigor didn't hold back any moans or thoughts. Letting his hands travel down further their sweat-covered bodies he caressed and squeezed Stan's thighs.

"Man, I swear, you've got the biggest legs."

This was one too many for Stan. The heat pooling inside his abdomen overwhelmed him and he came with a loud growl, trying not to collapse onto Grigor who just in that moment followed him, covering their chests in spurts of hot cum. Unable to make much sense of anything anymore Stan was sure this orgasm couldn't compare to anything he's experienced before. And if this was to be the first and the last time he was to ever experience it, fine. He could die in peace now.

"Hey." He heard the warm voice of the Bulgarian who was already wiping off cum from his body with a tissue and had his other arm opened to welcome Stan to lay with him.

Stan composed himself and disposed of the condom, wrapping it in a tissue and throwing it in the bin beside the bed. He felt exhausted so he curled into the other's embrace and stared at the ceiling for a moment, suddenly blinking rapidly, struggling to hold back a tear when realization kicked in what just happened. He turned his head to look at Grigor to find him with his eyes closed, looking all peaceful and sated. Stan's heart stung at the sight, this man must be the most beautiful creature he's ever seen on this planet.

After a while Stan decided that he should probably leave and got up, careful not to disturb Grigor. When his weight was lifted of the bed, however, the other stirred, muttering an unmistakable "stay".

Stan was torn, should he? He didn't have any duties tonight, so why shouldn't he?

Reluctantly he climbed back into bed and pulled at the cover to place it over the two of them. Grigor threw and arm over Stan's stomach and he must admit it felt strange, unfamiliar to have someone laying in bed with him. He switched off the lights and tried to allow himself to relax in Grigor's presence and let the warmth lull him into sleep. However, while Grigor seemed to be fast sleep, his even breath telling Stan, he just couldn't drift off himself. His thoughts started running wild. Thoughts of what just happened. The embarrassing thought of Grigor having noticed his clumsiness due to it being his first time. But then much worse, Nole. How on earth?! Stan sighed annoyed. This was all too exciting and upsetting at the same time. There was no chance he was going to find any sleep tonight. Not in a bed with Grigor anyway. And suddenly he couldn't bear the thought of having to face Grigor in the morning. What was he supposed to say to him? Would they have breakfast together? No. No. Stan wasn't ready for this. He needed to get out of here. Now.

So with as little noise as possible he stole himself out of bed and tiptoed into the living room where he gathered his clothes and eventually left in the shelter of the darkness.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Glimpses into the past. A painful, painful past.

Stan hurried home. Calling a cab since the snow wasn't letting up. With a pained and hollow gaze Stan watched the lights and buildings pass by in a blur. Sighing and hiding his face in his hands. He shouldn't have left Grigor in bed alone like that. He shouldn't have. He had panicked ok, Nole in his mind had scared him. Terrified him. The scar itched painfully making Stan draw in a breath. God Grigor would feel horrible in the morning. It had been amazing, incredible the Swiss would have liked to stay with Grigor in bed. Maybe have breakfast with him. It wasn't an option. Not when he knew that he was potentially endangering Grigors life.

The are no feelings involved, he tells himself.

The cab halted in front of his shop. Stan paying the driver generously before hurrying upstairs. Taking the stairs two at a time and unlocking the door with shaky hands. He needed three tries to put the key into the slot. Thats how much his hands were shaking. Finally unlocking the door the Swiss stumbled inside. Kicking off his boots and throwing his coat on the armchair next to the small glass table. Hurrying to the kitchen Stan poured himself a glass of bourbon. 

Taking the bottle with him and putting it on the glass table, Stan gulped down the first glass in one swift motion, swirling the liquid in his mouth, trying to calm himself. Sitting down on the ebony leathered armchair, Stan poured himself another glass. Looking up at the ceiling, his hand still clutching the glass. His scar was screaming in pain now and the Swiss didn't dare to touch his knee. He allowed himself to get lost in the past. In memories.

Painful, painful memories.

Everything had started nearly 20 years ago. 

When Stan had been 8 his family moved from Switzerland to New York in hopes of a better life. His father had started as a construction worker. His mother had tried to busy herself with various jobs to support the family. It hadn't been easy since all of them just spoke French at that time. The Swiss wasn't really welcome at the public school he was attending. His english was not very good. 

Thats where he met Nole for the first time. The other was 2 years younger than him. They clicked instantly. Like Stan, Noles family had moved to New York in hopes of a better life. The two boys getting along incredibly well. Nole becoming his best friend. The spend time at eachothers houses. Nole was better of than his friend. His fathers job allowing for more luxury. Which Nole never bragged about however. 

Both of them spend the next 7 years in relative peace. Thats when Stans father died in a work accident. A building collapsing and burying him underneath. His mother died of a broken heart a month later leaving a 15 year old Stan devastated. The Djokovics took him in. Treating him like their own child. Stan had stopped talking for a while. He didn't go to school after his mother had died. Nole was always by his side. Hugging him. Offering him comfort. Letting him cry in his chest, waking him up from nightmares when Stan would scream in the middle of the night. It wasn't easy. But Nole helped. 

He was his best friend. His brother. Before the year concluded another tragedy struck them. The Djokovics were on their way to a dinner when their car crashed against a tree due to a slippery snowy night. Killing them instantly. Leaving both boys alone and devastated. It was Stans turn to comfort his friend. 

"Please don't leave me Stanislas. You are the only one I have left. Please. Please promise me you won't leave me."

While holding a crying Nole against his chest, Stan vowed to stay by his side no matter what. Promised to always protect him. He couldn't know that he would break that promise about 7 years later. Nole had inherited some money from his father Stan was nearly 18 at that time. The money proved not to be enough to support them and soon him and Nole landed on the streets. The cold, unforgiving streets of New York City. They didn't have money. They were still underage. 

They slept on the streets of New York City for a few months. Stan holding his friend close. They even had to steal food for a while, Stan was against it but soon the hunger took over and he had to take care of Nole. He had promised. The nights were the worst. Nole was terrifed of the darkness. Curling around Stans chest and whimpering.

"I am scared Stanislas. Please make this stop. Please."

The Serb had always been afraid of the dark since he had been a child and had seen the horrors of his own country. Darkness meant bad things. He didn't want darkness please. Determined to help his friend Stan tried to find a job on his own which proved to be difficult until he stumbled across this shop. 

A coffee shop. In the middle of winter in a snow storm. Stan had wandered around, Nole always leaving in the evening, essencially leaving him alone. The shop looked warm and welcoming, Stan looked into his pocket. He had enough money for a warm drink which was enough. He would split that one with Nole.

Upon entering the shop smelled of cinnamon and freshly brewed coffee. A tall, dark haired man operating the coffee machine. A small man with a backward hat whistling and singing. Stan must have looked half frozen, because when the owners, Stan assumed it were the owners turned around to him and looked at him wide eyed. 

"Santa Maria madre de dios. Are you ok, hijo ?? You look half frozen. Come. Sit down. Lukasz amor prepare a hot chocolate."

Stan opened his mouth to protest but he closed it again. The man had turned around and pushed a plate with cookies towards the Swiss. Stan wanted to tell them he didn't have enough money for the chocolate.

"I… I don't have enough money, mister please. I can't accept this. What can I get with this much ??"

Stan dropped the coins on the counter which the dark haired man looked at. He pushed the chocolate and the cookies towards Stan.

"I can't accept this please. You are hard working people."

Stan looked at his feet ashamed. He was sure he looked filthy. Living on the streets did that to one. He could at least take the chocolate to Nole. Still it didn't felt right using these peoples generosity. Stan didn't want that but Nole was cold and he could use the chocolate.

Just this once, Stan told himself. He knew that he had stolen from people but he had just acted on survival instinct. Just this once. The cup warmed his half frozen fingers and Stan sighed. Sipping on it carefully. He would drink some and bring the rest to Nole.

"Thank you very much Mister."

"My name is Marcelo. You are welcome kiddo. You are welcome to come by again sometime really."

Stan gulped and thanked both of them before grabbing the cup and running towards the alley he had left Nole in. His friend was curled up in a paper carton.

"Nole. Nole wake up. Look I have a warm drink. You have to sit up and drink please."

"I am tired of this life Stanislas. I don't want to live on the streets forever."

"I will find a job soon I promise ok ??"

Stan passed the shop again. It looked so warm and cozy. Stan wanted to go in but he had no money. His nose was pressed against the glass. The Swiss turning around, shivering. 

"Hijo ?? Are you ok ??"

Stan froze. He wanted to run away. 

"Come in hijo. You are freezing. It's cold. Come in."

Hesitantly Stan went inside. It was so nice and warm. Making him sigh. 

"Lukasz amor please prepare a hot chocolate."

"Please I can't accept this. I don't have money."

"Then work here", Lukasz said.

"Huh ??"

Marcelo was leaning against the counter.

"We actually need someone to help us. So if you want you can work here and of course we will pay you."

Stan gaped at them like a fish. Blinking at Marcelo in disbelief. He didn't understand. 

"Don't worry of course we will show you everything. Thats not a problem. And please don't feel pressured. You can think about it. We would also have a room for you."

Stan nodded. There was too much information for him. But he could get a job ??

"Can I… Can I bring my brother. He is the only one I have left."

Marcelo and Lukasz nodded. Him and Nole started working in the shop together. Stan was naturally gifted. It was funny working with coffee. In a sense Marcelo and Lukasz became their surrogate fathers. Although both of them weren't that much older than Stan and Nole. Nole didn't quiet accept it. Once he had turned 20 he left the coffee shop while Stan stayed. They had managed to rent an appartment together. Nole would disappear. Saying he had found a different job. That payed more. 

Stan stayed for another two years. The coffee shop and coffee making bringing him so much joy. That was until Nole showed up one evening when Stan was about to close the shop. Marcelo and Lukasz having left earlier that day. Nole hadn't messaged him in days. Stan worried about his friend. He wouldn't show up for a few days. Weeks even. 

"Stan. Stanislas. I need your help please."

The Serb had grabbed Stans arm and was shaking him. Or thats what Stan thought. Nole wasn't shaking him but rather he was shaking and transfering it towards Stan.

"Whats going on ?? Are you ok ??"

"I fucked up Stanislas. I fucked up."

Stan cocked his head to the side. His friend had hidden his face in his chest, trembling. Noles warm breath sending goosebumps and shivers down Stans spine. His brain screaming protect. He had to protect his brother. From everything. Thats what he had vowed. 

"What happened Nole ?? You fucking disappeared on me man. I was worried ok. You told me you'd call."

"I know I know. I am sorry but we have to leave now."

"Nole…"

"NOW Stanislas."

The Serb grabbed his arm and dragged him towards and alley. The darkness sheltering them. While Nole hated the darkness, Stan didn't mind it.

"Nole damnit tell me what is going on ??"

"I can't."

Stan halted abruptly. Nole turning around and grabbing his arm. His eyes wide in what Stan believed was fear. 

"Please. We have to leave now."

Stan didn't budge. 

"Stanislas. Please. We have to move." Nole sounded incredibly desperate now. Stan had never heard him like that. Ever. His resistence crumbled and he followed Nole into the darkness of the night. They ran through the alley together. Until Nole halted abruptly.

"There you are Djokovic. Oh you brought a friend how nice of you. Did you really think you could steal from us and get away with that ?? First we will kill your little friend here. You'll watch him bleed out and then we will kill you."

Stan growled. His instincts taking over. He pushed Nole behind him. 

"Get your fucking hands off him."

"Stanislas don't", Nole whispered into his ear. 

"Oh look is your boyfriend protecting you ??"

Stan growled and punched their leader in the face. Nole shaking behind him. Out of the corner of his eye a goon approached him with a pocketknife, Stan pushed Nole away and managed to block it, headbutting the guy and knife fell to the floor with a clatter. The third guy was punched in the stomach, Stan panting harshly. 

There were still two others left. One of them drawing a gun and pointing it in Noles face. The Serb freezing on the spot. A shot ran through the silent night, Nole was prepared for the worst but nothing happened, instead he heard a thud and groan. He was laying on the floor, unharmed. Wait but if he was unharmed who had been shot ?? Nole turned around in fear.

Stan groaned in pain. He had no idea what had happened. The guy had pointed the gun at Noles face and he had acted on pure instinct. There was this horrible pain in his leg, Stan was sure it was muffled by the adrenaline cruising through his veins. His vision was hazy.

"Stanislas ?? Oh my God. Stanislas you have to stay awake ok ??"

Nole ?? Why did Nole sound so scared. What was going on ??

"Stanislas please you have to stay awake. I called an ambulance. You are going to be ok. Oh God I am so sorry. I shouldn't have gotten you involved. Stay awake ok. Please. Please don't leave me alone. You promised me. Please. Stanislas ??"

Stan felt warm all of a sudden and tired. So tired. Nole had grabbed his knee. But why ?? Why did his friend sound so scared. He just wanted to sleep please. Then everything got blurry. Stan was falling.

Nole screamed in agony. Shaking Stan desperately.

"Don't leave me alone. Don't leave me alone. Don't leave me alone. Not you too. Not you too. You promised Stanislas. Wake up. Please. WAKE UP !!! I love you please. Please."

Nole gagged at the blood. He threw up next to his friend. It was disgusting. Disgusting. Make this stop. Please. Nole was screaming and crying until the ambulance finally came. His eyes hollow. He would lose the only person he had left. Stans knee was in a pool of blood. The Serb ripping out strands of his own hair. Make it stop. It looked disgusting. Someone fix him. Fix his friend please. 

Stan was rushed to the hospital. Nole following them like a zombie. The bullet was gone through Stans knee. His friend was in surgery for hours. Nole rocking himself back and forth. Stan would be ok. He would be ok. He needed to be ok. At one point Nole started crying and laughing hysterically. If something happened to Stan than his own life had no sense. No sense. There had been so much blood so much.

Blood. So much blood. Blood. Make it stop. 

Stan was in intensive care for over a week. The doc said it would be a miracle if he could walk again. While Stan was in the hospital and in rehab Nole had sworn himself to get revenge. He would kill all those fuckers that nearly took Stan away from him. All of them. And thats what he did but not before staying by Stans side until he woke up. Holding his hand. 

"Nole ?? Where am I ??"

"Hospital love."

Stan let the love slip. Nole had been confused and scared. The Serb caressing his hair. Stan let that slip too. His friend had always been clingy. He had been scared it was normal. 

Nole didn't show up as usual one day. Not in the morning at least. He showed up at night. His face and hands full of blood. His eyes crazy and wide.

"I killed them my love. All of them. They hurt you and I made them suffer. I cut them to pieces." He announced proudly. Stan was frozen in shock until Nole looked at his hands and clutched his head in his hands. Screaming.

"Blood. So much blood. Make it stop. Stanislas. Stanislas please don't leave me. Please. I am afraid of the dark."

"Nole go wash yourself." Stan had no idea why he had said that. He was still trying to protect his friend. The Serb did as he was told. Sitting next to Stans bed and stroking his hand. His eyes hollow.

"Blood so much blood", he mumbled. 

Stans rehab took over a year. Nole had already established the gang by then. His mental health declining drastically. Stan had noticed but rehab prevented him from talking to his friend and then it was too late. Nole was gone. 

His Nole. His best friend and brother. Just like that. Stan had blamed himself ever since. He had even joined the gang to keep an eye on his friend. To protect him. But it was too late.

He had failed. He had failed him. There wasn't a day that went by that Stan didn't blame himself. Stan nearly dying had messed with his friends brain. The trauma too much to handle. To relieve himself from the burden he opened "WWRNKS" in Manhatten. The job allowing him to forget about Nole for a little while. It was a little piece of peace.

Stans eyes snapped open. His heart hurt. For Nole. For himself but also for Grigor. He shouldn't have slept with him. With a roar the burboun glass was thrown across the room. Shattering against the wall. Stan hiding his face in his hands. His shoulders shaking.

What the hell had he done ??

He cared about Grigor. He shouldn't care but he did. Damnit he did. It was dangerous. Feelings were dangerous. Thats when he realized he had forgotten his scarf at the photoshoot. God he wouldn't be able to look the other in the face. He had left him alone. Had used him like a damn prostitute.

God he was such a horrible human being. 

The worst part was that he had fallen in love. With that gorgeous man he didn't deserve. He had lied to him. He had used him. 

Stan looked at the city beneath his feet. He felt undeserving. Of everything. He shouldn't have let it come so far. He had let Grigor in his heart and now he was endangering his life.

Maybe he should have died that day.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lets say Stan is having one of the worst days of his life.

When Grigor woke up the next morning he didn't exactly expect to cuddle a warm body, although thats what he had hoped. A small part in his brain praying for Stan to have stayed in bed with him this wasn't the case however. The side next to him was cold. Ice cold. Sighing the Bulgarian looked at the ceiling. He hadn't really expected Stan to stay in bed, the Swiss had probably panicked, given it had been his first time.

Yes, Grigor had noticed. It hadn't been hard to miss. Not when Stan had been so nervous. Shaking and generally not knowing what to do, not that Grigor had minded guiding him or anything really. He had still hoped for the other to stay in bed though, maybe they could have talked about it ?? There was nothing to be ashamed of afterall. It had been amazing. Better than anything Grigor had experienced. Now he lay tangled up in the bedsheets, thinking about the Swiss. 

While getting up, Grigor noticed the blue and white scarf on the floor. He picked it up and buried his nose into the fabric, Stans smell was still in his nose from last night. Clinging into the sheets and pillow. Hey at least he had an excuse to turn up at the coffee shop without making it awkward. And maybe get a chance to talk since Stan had clearly panicked and left in a hurry.

Grigor didn't blame him. At all. 

Stan blinked into the darkness of his room. The bedsheets had gotten caught up around his ankles, one arm hanging off the bed. His phone was ringing merciless and Stan buried his head under the pillow to block out the noise or at least he tried to. It wasn't his alarm. Someone was calling. With a sigh and a growl, the Swiss snatched the phone from the nightstand, the artificial light making his head hurt.

God how much had he drunk last night ?? 

He usually wasn't one to get drunk. He didn't like to lose control. Control he had lost control a long time ago. He had lost control since he had lost Nole. 

Nole was indeed calling him. 

Unlocking the phone Stan pressed it against his ear, before he had a chance to say anything, his friend began talking. His voice a mix of worry and annoyance. It was unmistakable, Nole slipped into Serbian which the Swiss understood since living with the Djokovics. Nole was angry.

"Stanislas ?? Where have you been ?? You didn't pick up your phone. Are you alright ?? We agreed to attack Rafa and his people yesterday. Did you forget ??"

Stan clutched his head, Noles angry and loud voice not helping his pounding headache. 

Fuck the attack. He had been so caught up with Grigor and the shoot that he had completely forgotten about the planned attack on Nadal and his gang, maybe it was for the better really. 

"We will attack them tonight. Whatever reasons you had must have been important. But don't leave me in the dark again, Stanislas."

A warning. A clear warning. Nole hung up, he knew that Stan had understood without waiting for confirmation. The Swiss started to laugh hysterically. Maybe it was still the alcohol in his blood.

Yeah good reason not to call his ass. 

It's not like he could have told Nole, hey sorry I couldn't come to the meeting because I was busy having a photoshoot with this insanely hot guy who I gave my virginity afterwards. Very important reason indeed. 

In his rage and guilt Stan had not only shattered a glass but also drowned the whole bottle of a 50 year old whisky but had also killed the bottle too. Great. He had lost control… 

There were glass shards everywhere and Stan was in desperate need of a shower. He would clean up afterwards. His body had reacted to what had happened the night before. Despite the taste of whiskey in his mouth he could still taste, Grigor. Faint. Sweet. So sweet. The shower proved to be heaven. It was like he could wash his sorrows away. For a moment. 

In those three minutes he didn't think about anything and anyone. 

After cleaning up, Stan pulled down the blinds and settled into bed again. He wouldn't open the coffeeshop today. He needed some alone time. It was bad enough that he had to face Nole in about 12 hours. If he saw Grigor his brain would probably explode. The guilt was eating him up, Stan hugging a pillow to his chest. It had been a mistake to sleep with the Bulgarian. He had developed feelings. Feelings he shouldn't have. Feelings were dangerous.

If Nole got to know. No. Stan shook his head. No. No. No. No. Nole would never get to know about this. Grigor would be dead. Never, Stan swore himself.

You swore yourself to protect Nole see what happened, his head mocked him. Cruel. Unforgiving.

You couldn't protect Nole, what makes you think you can protect Grigor ??

Switching his phone to silent mode and setting an alarm, the Swiss fell back into the pillow. Dreaming of Grigor again. 

As promised he showed up at the garage. Nole was in the "conference room" hunched over a table. A New York City map taking up the whole surface. He wasn't alone however. Despite the heavy boots he was wearing Stan was as silent as a cat. Nick was pressed up to the Serbs side. A hand in his neck. The other against his lower back and travelling to his side. One finger hooked into the black jeans. Whispering something into Noles ear. The Serb growled. Angry. Almost animalistic. Turning his head away from the Aussie. His whole frame screaming uncomfortable.

There was fury blazing in Stans eyes. That damn bastard. He would break every bone in his damn body. How dare he ?? Stan had told him to stay away from Nole. Clearing his throat unnecessarily loud, Stan made his presence known. Nick whirling around, smirking satisfied towards him. Licking his lips, while Stan balled his hand into a fist ready to punch him in the face for having ignored his warning.

It was Nole who broke the silence.

"Stanislas. You are here." There was relief in his friends words ?? Stan wasn't sure. His mind was still a little bit clouded from the whisky. He would deal with Nick later. He had warned him. Maybe he had to break some bones to get his point across and make sure Nole was off limits. His friend was sick damnit. Nick feigned innocence when he passed Stan, whistling through his teeth. 

"Where were you yesterday, Stanislas ??"

"Sorry I didn't fell well. I was asleep the whole day and didn't hear my phone."

Concerned Nole pressed a hand against his forhead. Stan shook it off.

"I am fine now", he grunted.

Nole turned his back to him.

"I send Paire, Fognini and Tsitsipas to scout the area. They should be back soon. We have waited long enough for this."

"You know that Nadal offered us a peace treaty."

Nole scoffed, irritated that Stan dared to talk about THAT.

"Peace treaty. And share our beautiful city with those animals. This is OUR city, Stanislas. Federer that coward needs to get out of his hole so I can destroy him. Nadal is no fun. He has no idea about tactics. Just brute force. Boring."

Nole was raging like a bull. He really hated Rogers guts. Stan had tried to talk Nole out of this. Usually he was good with grounding his friend but this idea had stayed presistent in his head for nearly 5 years now. Not even Stan could do something about it. Then his mood shifted like it always did. 

"Are you sure you are ok darling ?? You look pale maybe I shouldn't have called."

Stan sighed. It was always better when Stan was there if his friend got one of his plans. Damage control and stuff. He could still convince him not to kill anyone or at least try to. Nick had disappeared in a corner. Stan was determined to deal with him later. Thats when everyone else made their presence known.

The hunt had began anew like Nole liked to call it. 

Within the minute Nole had explained the plan. He knew that Rafa and the others would be out to patrol. The perfect opportunity for an attack. Everyone scattered in different directions. Even Nole left on his own which was unusual, he preferred to stick by Stans side. Using the moment as a breather Stan wandered around. Lost in thoughts. Mostly worry. He really worried a lot about Nole.

It's your fault he is like that. You should have fixed him…

A noise made Stan look up. His eyes wide.

"You have grown hijo. We are glad."

Stans eyes widened. Rogers retirement and Rafas takeover hadn't happened too long ago. Maybe half a year at the latest.

"Marcelo… Lukasz…" Stan was frozen in shock. He had, had no idea that his former surrogate fathers were part of the gang. Like no idea. Roger would always send Nadal or the Zverevs or Thiem. 

"They are after baby Zverev huh ?? Sasch."

Stan gulped. He was loyal to Nole. He really was. But he was also loyal to Marcelo and Lukasz. He had never lied to them since they had taken them in. 

Stans silence proved to be enough because Marcelo squeezed Lukasz wrist and the Pole nodded at him, kissing his lips before looking at Stan one more time and disappearing around the next corner.

"They want to use Sascha as leverage to get Papa Rogi huh ?? What happen hijo ?? You and Nole disappear. Gone."

Before Stan could answer there was a shout. Marcelos blood draining from his face.

"Kubi", he whispered scared. And then he was gone. Stan running after him. Fuck. Lukasz was supporting himself with one arm. The other clutching his side, Marcelo was in front of him immediately. Snarling at Nick furiously, who just laughed. Before he had the chance to attack Marcelo he was tackled to the ground.

"Ah baby Zverev. At least we don't have to search for you anymore."

Before Nick could make a move Mischa had slammed him to the ground.

Snarling "Get away from my brother" angrily.

"Ah look the whole fam is here. I wonder where Nadal and Thiem are. Maybe bossman has already found them."

As if on cue Fognini and Benoit appeared behind Nick. Holding a squirming Dominic by the neck.

"Get your fucking hands off him."

"Oh did we hit a nerve baby Zverev ??"

All of them laughed. A blade was held against the Austrians neck.

"Be nice or he will look like a fountain. We wouldn't want that would we ?? Can't have that without Nadal. Thiem is his precious son afterall."

None of them dared to move. If someone was capable of making threats true it was Nick. Domi headbutted Fognini and slid out of the grasp, sprinting towards his own group. Meanwhile Nole had also reached them.

"You are good for nothings. All of you", he scolded, "where is Stanislas ?? If something happened to him I swear. Melo. Kubot. What a surprise to see you two here."

The Pole and the Brazilian remained silent. Marcelo had curled an arm protectively around Lukasz waist and had hoisted him up. Before any of them had the chance to move they froze.

"Enough."

Nole smirked devilish. Almost satisfied. Liking his lips like a cat after a delicious meal of milk. Laughter escaping his mouth. Finally. Nadal showed his face. 

"So you aren't hiding with your husband and letting your goons do the work. Bravo."

Nole applauded in mocking. Rafa however didn't pay attention to him. At all.

"Dominic. Are you alright ??"

"I am fine dad."

After having made sure that his son was ok, Rafa directed his full attention towards Nole. With a motion of his hand he signalled his people to leave. Who naturally were about to protest when the Spaniard rose his hand again to silence them effectively. All of them leaving.

"Ha do you really think you can fight us on your own. You are dumber than a brickwall Nadal seriously."

"I am not here to fight you. Leave."

Nole being Nole didn't accept the answer and roared. Charging at Rafa like an angry bull, blinded by rage and hatred, granting the Spaniard the upper hand who slammed him into the ground. Effortlessly. Nole was naturally skinny and lanky. Barely muscles or flesh to his bones. Thats why Stan was the brawn. Usually. Rafa was hauled away. The Serb coughing and wheezing.

"Don't touch him."

"Wawrinka…"

"Get away from him", Stan said dangerously. Low. So low. He wouldn't let anyone touch Nole. Not Nadal and not Federer. 

"You have choosen the wrong friends, Wawrinka."

Stan felt like crying. He didn't choose. Well he had choosen Nole. But his Nole was gone and the Nole that was left, if good or bad, was still his responsibility to take care of. He would always protect him. From himself and everyone else. 

Rafa shook his head. Looking like a disappointed father whos child had disobeyed his orders and left. Stan helping Nole up. The others had already left. Those damn cowards. If he hadn't shown up Nole would have gotten hurt. And blood wasn't his forte. His friend would have lost his mind and be vulnerable. 

"Stanislas", Nole whispered. The snow still falling steadily casting the world in silence. Before Stan knew what was happening, Nole had pressed him against a wall. Pushing his whole body against him. His lips crashing down on Stans. Whos eyes were wide in shock. Never moving. Or kissing back. Just pure shock. Nole licked his lips when he finally, finally pulled back. This had felt wrong. Stan was in love with someone else. Nole was his bother. He would never be more. Never. 

You should have saved him, his heart screamed, look what you have done. He shouldn't have turned out like that if you would have taken care of him.

Guilt was eating Stan up. Everyday since that incident. Every. Damn. Day. It was his fault. His fault alone Nole was like this. He wanted the old Nole back. The old Nole was gone. He was dead. 

When Stan turned around Nole had disappeared into the night. The Swiss also heading back. He still had to take care of Kyrgios. Nick waited for him in front of the garage. That guy really had a deathwish huh ?? 

"He kissed you and you didn't kiss back ??"

Stan stiffened. Drawing in a sharp breath. With a growl he slammed Nick against the wall. 

"Touch him again and you are a dead man. I will cut off all of your fingers one by one do you understand ?? Don't test me you bastard. Nole is off limits."

To make his threat clear Stan whipped out his Swiss army knife he had gotten from his father years ago, the small knife being pressed to the Aussies throat, a thin line of blood trailing down his skin. Stan surely wasn't joking. With a huff Nick nodded trying not to get the knife to dig deeper into his skin. Stan let him go. 

Upon entering the garage Nole was waiting for him, Nick had left. To clean himself up probably. Stan didn't care about him. The Serb avoided his look. He shouldn't have let that happen. Nole was hurting because of him. It shouldn't have happened. His duty was to protect Nole from himself. He had failed. Failed miserably. The Serb looked at. His eyes huge. Full of fear. He looked so young all of a sudden. 

"I am sorry, Stanislas…"

Thats when Stan caught it. For a fraction of a second. A minimal shift in Noles eyes. For a second it seemed as if the real Nole was looking at him. HIS Nole. His brother. But as soon as if had appeared it disappeared. Leaving Stan hollow. It hurt ok. It hurt that he couldn't help his friend. 

His Nole was gone. Forever. 

Stan turned around and left. He couldn't deal with this. Not now. He needed to drown his sorrow. With something. Anything. While rounding a corner his knees buckled and Stan started crying. His hands balled up into fist as he pressed his head against a wall. He should have saved him… 

Stan barely slept that night. His coffeemaking distracting him. For a bit. Until like clockwork Grigor showed up. Making Stans stomach churn he wanted to throw up so badly.

"Hey you forgot your scarf the other day. I came to return it but your shop was closed. Are you ok ?? I was worried ??"


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stan has a talk which makes him realize a few things.

The mug Stan was cleaning slipped from his fingers and shattered on the floor. Grigor hurrying in front of the counter, his eyes scanning the Swiss' face worriedly. With a sigh the broom on the other end of the counter was grabbed and Stan cleaned his mess up. He hadn't noticed that Grigor was wearing his scarf.

"Stan are you ok ?? You look pale. Maybe you shouldn't have opened the shop. Come sit down please. Jesus you look like you are about to collapse. Let me get you a glass of water."

Stan was sat on a table, Grigors warm hand sending shivers down his spine, while the other filled a glass with water and placed it in front of the Swiss. A warm hand was squeezing his knee, his hurt knee, Grigors warm eyes looking into his. It wasn't creepy like with Nole. It felt nice, having someone who cared about him. Stan drowned the glass but remained silent. If he was honest he had no idea what to say. 

They had fucked and now ?? What happened now ?? Did they go back to just being a customer and a coffeemaker ?? Stan had no idea how this worked. 

A warm fabric was pressed into his palm, Grigor smiling at him.

"You forgot this at the photoshoot."

Stan blushed immediately, his hand balling itself into a fist. Grigor was rubbing the back of his neck and looking at his feet when Stan looked back up, there was also a faint blush on the others face. Today he didn't have his trusty camera with him. His laptop was also missing so he had just braved the storm to return his scarf, Stan thought. 

Grigor had sat next to Stan on the chair remaining silent. The storm was getting worse and the Swiss shouldn't even have opened the shop. No one would come by. He had, had like two customers since he opened it at 6. It didn't look like anyone else would come anyway but also he couldn't throw Grigor out like that only because he was panicking. 

"I'll make us a hot chocolate and we talk about what happened ??"

Grigor tilted his head like a confused puppy but nodded. 

The Bulgarians eyes were on his back, Stan could feel them while he operated his machine. Grabbing two random mugs. They turned out to be his "The Boss" mug and one with a teddybear holding a heart with badass written across it. When Stan handed Grigor the mug the other chuckled amused, his laughter filling the shop, making Stans heart skip a beat. It was such a beautiful laugh. 

"Are you sure you don't play ??", Grigor was pointing to the ebony colored guitar mounted on the wall.

Stan nearly spilled his hot chocolate. Burning his whole mouth in the process. Nole. Why was every goddamn thing remind him of Nole ?? Why ?? 

"Sorry I don't. My brother gifted me that for my 18th birthday. I haven't played in years."

I don't think I will ever play again, but those words went unspoken. 

Grigor seemed a little bit disappointed with the answer but thankfully he let it go. Casting both of them in silence again. Which Stan was grateful for. What was he doing here anyway ?? Grigor touching his arm snapped him out of his thoughts. Sending goosebumps and shivers down his spine. His body being reminded of what they had done. Squeezing his eyes shut, Stan breathed out through his nose. 

"Sorry I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable really. Maybe I should go. I only wanted to return the scarf."

That was the moment that made Stan panic. He didn't want to be alone. With his thoughts and guilt. Please. 

"Stay", he whispered barely audible, small like a child who was afraid of the dark, except Stan was afraid of his own head. 

Grigor sat back down, his palms wrapped around the mug, brows frowned in worry, while he watched Stan squeeze his eyes shut. Pinching his nose. The Swiss didn't have the courage to speak about what had happened, he flinched and coffee splattered all over the table when Grigor touched his naked arm. He really should start wearing long sleeves God damnit. The palm of Grigors hand was warm against Stans skin.

Trying to think what to say, Stan chewed on his lower lips until it was raw and bloody. That when the bell above the door rang making him look up. His eyes widening. Despite the beanies and scarves over their heads and faces, the Swiss recognized them immediately. How couldn't he ??

Marcelo and Lukasz.

The latter was wiping his feet on the mat while the tall Brazilian had unwrapped his scarf from his neck and went to sit on the counter.

"Excuse me for a sec", Stan whispered to Grigor. Damnit maybe he should have changed the sign from open to closed seriously. Now he was in trouble most probably. 

"Welcome to WWRNKS what can I do for you today", Stan said robotically. 

Lukasz has plopped down next to Marcelo. His beanie laying on the counter, smoothing his hair down that had been ruffled up by his beanie. One hand on Marcelos arm. Both of them smiling lightly. They looked at eachother for a sec and than at the menu. Stan couldn't help but shake praying that none of them would notice. 

"We'll take two hot chocolates. With whipped cream."

The Swiss nodding, robotic yet again, operating his machine. Being grateful that he hadn't to face both of them. His hand shaking when he put the mugs on the table. Lowering his head and resting it on his arms on the counter. Grigor was looking through his phone, thankfully. 

"What are you two doing here ??", he hissed in mild annoyance.

Both Marcelo and Lukasz remained unimpressed. Sipping on their hot chocolates, unhurried, carefree. Their hands interlaced on the counter. Stan was shaking, trembling like a leaf. 

"Just wanted to check out new shop."

Lukasz nodded.

"Exquisite hot chocolate. Swiss right ??"

Stan stared at them in disbelief. Did they want to fuck with him or what. Of course Stan was grateful for all they had done to him but still.

"You looking sad last night, hijo. So sad. Nole not ok."

Marcelo shook his head. A sad expression on his face. 

"I… I can't talk now." Stan glanced towards Grigor who was still busy with his phone, a soft expression on his face. Stan wanted to smack himself.

Marcelo had brought the mug to his lips, blowing at it carefully, watching Stan through half open eyelids.

"You like that guy ??"

Stan froze. A shiver running down his spine. He knew that Marcelo and Lukasz were his friends. Even though they worked for different gangs. It still unsettled him that they saw his object of affection. The job was making him paranoid. Grigor had nothing to do with all of this. Rafa wasn't someone to carelessly attack anyone or take revenge or so. At least it was something.

"Baby Stan is in love, Lukasz love. I am so proud."

Marcelo sniffled which Lukasz smiled contently unshakeable like a rock a soft expression on his face. They were proud.

"We were proud of you hijo. We came today to talk about something to you. Nole."

Stan choked.

They wanted to talk about Nole ?? Now ?? Why ??

The Swiss gulped and rounded the corner. He needed to talk to them in private. He didn't want Grigor to get involved in this. The Bulgarian had his headphones on and was watching something on his phone when Stan stood before him. Grigor giving him a smile.

"Hey can you get us some pastries from the bakery across the street ?? Pierre will be delighted and you can meet Nico too."

"Sure."

Stan brought Grigor to the door. The other grabbing his arm gently and pressing a soft kiss against Stan cheek. Leaving the Swiss with his mouth slightly open. Warmth spreading through his chest like liquid gold, his hand touching his cheek while watching Grigor cross the street. Sighing softly.

"You are in love", Lukasz said softly. 

"What happen to you hijo ?? You gone. We were worried about you."

Stan sat down on the stool next to Marcelo. Sighing out.

"I was in the hospital. The day you left early Nole showed up saying he was in trouble. I ended up in the hospital. Plus more than a year of rehab. When I got back you were gone. The shop was closed. Thats when Nole started becoming unstable. I had no idea where you had been."

Both of them looked shocked and worried.

"Are you ok now ??" Marcelo couldn't hide the worry in his voice.

"I am ok now. Well phsically. The scar still hurts sometimes but Nole… Nole is gone…"

"What happened to Nole, hijo ??"

Stan gripped the counter so hard his knuckles turned white. His jaw was set and tense. God Nole.

Stan started telling them what happened. How Nole had showed up at the hospital one night, covered in blood laughing hysterically and announcing that the ones that had hurt Stan were dead. That they couldn't hurt him anymore.

"We found bodies around the time you are describing. All of their hearts were missing."

Stan gagged. Oh God what had Nole done ?? 

"When I was released from the hospital you were gone and the shop was closed."

Lukasz sighed and sipped on his hot chocolate.  
Marcelo was the one to break the silence and speak.

"When we took you both in we were already part of Rogers gang. That night we had a mission that when we also found the bodies. You and Nole were gone we searched for you. I swear we did. Both of you were gone. After that Roger asked us for help. Sascha and Dominic were still very young."

"But I never saw you during all those years. Not on patrol nothing."

"Roger wanted us to help with tactical issues thats why we never went out. Until he decided to retire a few months ago. And Nole started getting even more aggressive. We wanted to come out, we wanted to see you at least. Until last night that didn't happen. Rafa has a different philosophy plus Sascha and Dominic need protection. Sascha is just a reckless boy. Him and Domi remind me very much of you and Nole when you were younger."

"Please hijo we never wanted to abandon any of you, you have to believe us."

Stan nodded he knew that Marcelo and Lukasz didn't do anything on purpose.

"What happen to Nole ?? He was such a sweet sweet boy."

"It's my fault. Everything is my fault. I should have taken better care of him. I should have kept him by my side. Then he wouldn't have wandered off. He wouldn't have gotten hurt. He ended up like that because of me."

Stan was choking at that. Everything was his fault.

"No hijo no it's not." Marcelo had squeezed his shoulder. Drawing Stan into a tight hug. The Swiss shaking like a leaf. 

Marcelo took Stans face in his hands gently.

"Not your fault hijo. Never your fault. You always look out for him. You always been good brother. What Nole did is his own fault. Not yours. Never yours."

Stan nodded. God he felt so tired all of a sudden.

"As painful as it sounds, you cannot save Novak. Not anymore. He is gone Stan. You have to live for yourself. He is killing you, dragging you with him into the abyss. I know you feel the urge to protect him and I get it. I swear I do but you have to find your own happiness. You can't let Nole cage you in. You deserve to be happy. That guy does he make you happy ??"

Stan shrugged. Him and Grigor hadn't really had a chance to talk. Mainly because Stan was being a coward about it of he was honest. Maybe Lukasz was right. Maybe it was time he chased his own happiness. He had put everything back for Nole. Everything. 

His own health. His happiness. Everything.

"It is time to live, hijo. If that guy makes you happy go for it. You deserve to be happy. Now is the time."

Before the conversation could continue, the bell above the door rang, Grigor entering the shop with a small box. Smiling at Stan. Lukasz and Marcelo drowned their hot chocolates, left money on the counter, hugged Stan briefly and left. 

But not before whispering into his ear "to live" and then they were gone into a snowy New York City. Grigor put the box on the counter and looked at Stan curiously.

"Everything ok ??"

"Yeah. Yeah everything is ok."

Grigor gave him one of those honeysweet smiles and Stans knees threatened to buckle. What a gorgeous man indeed. Grigor was stroking his arm gently and the Swiss had the urge to pull him in for a kiss. 

Do it you coward. Be happy. You deserve happiness.

"So uhm we wanted to ta-"

With new found boldness and confidence Stan pulled the Bulgarian in. Kissing him, gently. He didn't want to scare him away. Grigor kissed back and Stan melted against him like gold. Their lips still tasting faintly of hot chocolate and whipped cream. Grigor pushed their foreheads against eachother while Stans eyes remained closed and he breathed out. 

This had been different but not unwelcome. If Stan was honest his legs felt like jelly and only Grigors arm that was curled around his waist was preventing him from collapsing. 

"Sorry I shouldn't have-"

This time Grigor kissed him. Pressing his face against Stans temple and giggling.

"I waited the whole day for you to do that. Do you really think I would have slept with you if I wouldn't have wanted something more serious ?? I mean if you want to, too of course. No pressure. I just wanted to say what I had in mind."

"I would love to be in a relationship with you."

Grigor hummed and simply kissed Stan again. The storm outside raging like a wild beast. None of them could care about it.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their blissful bubble wasn't meant to last forever.

1 year later

Stan stretched his sleeping limbs like a cat, yawning soundlessly, trying not to wake Grigor next to him it was 5 in the morning after all. Running a gentle hand through the Bulgarians hair, the Swiss propped himself on his elbow and observed his sleeping boyfriend for a little while. Pressing a gentle kiss against Grigors forehead, Stan rolled out of bed and got dressed. Grabbing his phone from the nightstand and shutting the door. Grigor had insisted on waking up with him at 5. Stan would let him sleep for a while longer. 

Waking up with Grigor and having breakfast with him had become a routine Stan didn't want to miss. In the last year he was sure he had become too comfortable. Dropping his guard. He had even let meetings with Nole slip from time to time to go on late night dates with Grigor, which wasn't the smartest thing, Stan knew that. He was aware still he couldn't help himself. Grigor had given him some life back. Had painted his black and white world with bright colors. The loneliness had started to fade. 

Grigor was happiness. A happiness he hadn't felt in years. Decades. Stan had allowed himself to enjoy it. Like everything in life, there was a price to pay. The Swiss had tried not to think about it. Grigors light was enough for him.

Gulping down the coffee and putting the mug in the sink, Stan left the apartment as silent as a ghost. Like last year New York City was terrorized by a raging snow storm again. With a sigh Stan began his daily routine, Grigor would come down when he woke up and work on some pictures. Lukasz and Marcelo had visited from time to time which had been nice. 

A lot had happened in a year. Generally Stan was happier. Much, much happier still he had to slip his perfect mask on when meeting up with Nole and the others. Nick in particular had started annoying the Swiss more than usual. He was not even trying to hide the fact that he was hitting on Nole. In the back of his head Stan knew that Nick was trying to provoke a reaction from him but Stan had much more self control than the Aussie was giving him credit for. 

The daily routine started slowly. Stan letting his coffee machines heat up. 

Pierre and Nico had finally come over one day when Grigor was chilling with him, the shop being empty at that time. Both of his friends grinning from ear to ear when Pierre held up his hand. A ring shining on his finger. Stan had laughed happily. Nico had finally popped the question huh ?? About time really. Stan had offered them coffee on the house. The boys had brought a box of pastries as a gift. The Swiss introducing Nico to Grigor. 

"This is Nico the breadmaker."

Nico had laughed gently at the nickname. He loved his job ok. The boys spend some time in the coffee shop, Stan curiously asking about their plans. 

"You know maybe we will go back to France for our marriage. Don't get me wrong Stan we love New York but it's been years we have been to Paris. Don't you miss Switzerland too ??"

Stan had never thought about it if he was honest. New York had been his home since he remembered, he didn't connect anything to Switzerland. Of course his parents has spoken with him but that was the only thing. After Nico and Pierre had left, Stan found himself thinking about Switzerland. He asked himself how his homeland looked. He couldn't leave Nole alone though, despite what Lukasz and Marcelo had said, the Serb was still his responsibility. 

"Good morning beautiful."

Stan blinked and looked up from the mug he was unnecessarily cleaning. Grigor looked still half asleep. His usually perfect hair sticking up in every direction. He had thrown on one of Stans hoodies. The Swiss smiled softly and sighed, Grigor walking behind the counter and clutching the hoodie like a blanket before giving him a sleepy kiss. 

"Good morning to you too. I wanted to let you sleep it's still early."

Grigor nuzzled the Swiss cheek and pillowed his head on his shoulder.

"I was alone in bed and cold. My boyfriend was flirting with his coffee machines."

Grigor looked up to him with puppy eyes and pouted. Stan rolling his eyes fondly and pressing a kiss against the crown of his hair.

"How can your bad boyfriend redeem himself then ??", he asked innocently.

Grigor put his finger on his chin and pretended to think about it, Stan trying to hide a smile amused. He had never felt like this. There was this warmth spreading all over his chest whenever he was with Grigor. He had also made up excuses to not show up to nightly meetings with Nole. Lukasz and Marcelos words ringing in his mind.

Time to live.

Thats what he was doing or trying to do. 

Stan was grabbed by the hand. Grigor flipping the sign from open to closed, Stan letting him, before the Bulgarian lead them back upstairs. His hand never leaving Stans, making the Swiss sigh contently. Grigor had been the missing piece in his life. Stan couldn't know that this world he had started building for himself would crumble and fall like a house of cards.

For now he was blissfully unaware. Happy. For now. 

The door shut behind them and Grigor led them to the bed. Raising an eyebrow at his boyfriend before the hoodie hit the ground. Looking at the Swiss expectedly. Who was Stan to say no anyway. Not when his gorgeous, beautiful boyfriend asked for it anyway. Only a fool would say no.

Stan was a fool. But he was a fool in love. 

Grigor laughed gently when they were wrapped in layers of blankets together. Watching the snow storm rage on in the outside world. Their little bubble couldn't be pierced, right ?? 

Hours later when Grigor would lie on his chest, both of them wrapped in blankets, his hands painting imaginary pictures on Stans skin and looking up to him as if he was the whole universe, Stan felt at peace. His hand running across the Bulgarians naked back who in return giggled like a small child, melting Stans heart. He knew he was cheesy but he did not care one bit.

He was happy. So happy. Happier than he had ever been since his parents had died. 

Grigor off drifted to sleep after a while. Stan holding him safely in his arms like the most precious treasure. Running his hands up and down Grigors back and arms. He wanted to be able to watch him like that forever. In the back of his head he knew that he couldn't ignore Nole forever. 

He could get away with a few lies but his friend was not known for his patience. Nick was certainly not helping. Despite Lukasz well meant advice and warning the Swiss couldn't abandon his friend like that. He was still responsible for him, if he wanted it or not. Nole was losing his patience, thats why Stan had asked Lukasz and Marcelo for help. 

If Nole got to know all of them would be dead anyway. The Serb would never go down without a fight. Never. His hatred for Roger and Rafa knew no limits. The sole suggestion of a peace treaty set him off. In the past year he had started to become even more unstable. Nick was fueling him. Throwing gasoline into fire. Stan wasn't there as much as he used to be to act as a diffuser for his friend.

In hindsight Stan couldn't help Nole anymore. 

He was too far gone. His mind was gone. The Swiss found himself feeling guilty for his friends state. He was responsible for it. He had to fix it. He had to fix Nole.

You can't save him anymore, Lukasz words rang in his mind.

Cruel. Unforgiving. But true. 

He couldn't save Nole anymore. His Nole was dead and gone.

With Nole in his mind, Stan drifted off back to sleep, Grigor safely in his arms.

Meanwhile at the garage.

Nole was staring at his phone anxiously. He had noticed that Stan had started skipping meetings. At first he had dismissed it. His friend was busy with the coffee shop. But this had started happening too frequently. The Serb knew his friend well enough to know when he made excuses, they had missed a great opportunity in attacking Rafa and the others which was unacceptable. 

If it would have been someone else, Nole would have already killed them. 

Stan wasn't anyone. 

The Serb was walking up and down in his office, a scowl on his face. He was displeased with Stan behaviour. Sighing he grabbed his phone to dial the Swiss number before putting it on the table again. A movement making him whirl around.

Nick was leaning against the doorway. A sly grin on his face.

"Whats the matter bossman ?? Has your lover neglected you. He hasn't show up in a while. He is such a good boss huh ??" Nick threw his head back and laughed while approaching the Serb.

"He left you alone. Look at him. I wonder where he is. You should stop waiting for him. He left you alone, Novak. Such a good friend."

Nolw growled. Animalistic. Baring his teeth at the Aussie and invading his space, his eyes dark and ice cold. It felt like the temperature had dropped a few degrees. 

"If you say something like that about him again, I will slit your damn throat right here."

"He doesn't know what he has with you."

Nole turned around and laughed out loud.

"But you do ??", he challenged.

Nick grunted, Nole pushing at his shoulder hard while passing him by and grabbing his coat. He wasn't a fool. Nick was constantly in his personal space which was only reserved for Stan. He would go see his friend. The snow storm made it impossible at the moment. Maybe thats why Stan wasn't there. Nole would wait and see what his friend would say. 

A few weeks passed. The storm stopped. It got warmer. 

Grigor was back out and photographing stuff. Spring slowly awaking from it's slumber. The Bulgarian had wanted to take Stan with him. But he had some night sessions of shooting too and he'd rather have his boyfriend sleep at night if he was honest. The coffee shop was already too much sometimes. 

With Grigor having night sessions, Stan was able to go to the garage at night. Not that he really wanted to if he was honest. He had gotten used to not fighting with Rafa constantly. He still had to check on Nole though. In a sense Grigor had lifted some of the burden Stan always carried with himself. 

The guilt remained though. He had the feeling that he was abandoning Nole. 

During the day Grigor would keep him company. Talking about his newest pictures. Showing them to Stan with pride in his eyes. The Swiss would laugh softly. Sit next to him. His arm around his boyfriend. Pressing small kisses against his temple while Grigor would scroll through the pictures. 

"Can you surprise me with a spring creation this time, love ??"

Stan had never tried a "spring" coffee but he could try right. Anything for Grigor. God he was so whipped. Thats how teenagers in love felt huh ?? Stan didn't want to miss this feeling. He breezed through the coffee shop like a refreshing spring breeze. Unaware that they were being watched from afar. Blissfully unaware. Stan was in his little bubble. 

He sat the mug next to Grigor who smiled at him and got up. Wrapping his arm around his neck and pressing his nose against Stans nose. Eskimo kissing him before going in for a real kiss. Making the Swiss moan in delight. His hands finding the Bulgarians waist and pulling him impossibly closer. 

His palm stroking Grigors cheek lovingly when they broke apart. His eyes soft. Stan leaned in again and Grigor sighed against his lips.

"I love you, Grigor."

The Bulgarian laughed gently. 

Nole had finally gone to the coffee shop to check on Stan. The image he came across made his blood boil. At first Nole thought it was a mere customer but that man dared to touch and kiss Stan. The man that had been his since they met ?? 

This was unforgivable. Clenching his fist and jaw, Nole thought about his choices. If Stan had kept that away from him then his friend wouldn't have wanted for him to find out. For a second Nole thought about storming in into the coffee shop. He decided against it. No need to let Stan know that he saw anything. 

His friend should feel safe. The guy though, wouldn't feel safe. Determined to get rid of him, Nole left for the garage. 

"Kyrgios", he barked his voice steady but angry.

Nick appeared, looking incredibly bored, playing cards in hand.

"You called your majesty", he mocked the Serb. 

Nole growled. His hand wrapping itself around the others throat.

"Listen to me you cockroach. I have an assignment for you. If you fuck this up I will cut you up throw your worthless body into the sea. Now no talking just listening. If you say anything I will start cutting off your fingers one by one."

Nick stilled and remained silent.

10 minutes later Nick left, Nole sighing. He hoped the Austrialian wouldn't fuck this up. 

Grigor would sometimes help Stan in the shop. His boyfriend refusing to hire someone else. Always saying that the shop was his thing and he could handle it alone. Grigor had tried talking about expanding. Maybe opening a second shop. Stan had always said no. One shop was more than enough to handle really. 

"Pierre just called love. He has some pastires ready for me. Can you do me the favor and pick them up for me ?? I'll be getting a new shipment of coffee."

Grigor kissed Stan on the lips and waited for the traffic light to turn green, when someone bumped into him. Not even apologizing to him. Grigor ignored it and walked across the street as soon as the light turned green.

"Hey you know Stanislas, huh ??"

Grigor turned around confused.

"Stanislas ??"

"Stan. The owner of the coffeeshop."

Grigor nodded carefully.

"How do you know, Stan ??"

"I work with him."

Grigor narrowed his eyes. Stan didn't have employees. What was the guy talking about ??

"Oh he didn't tell you about his second job huh."

Grigor didn't understand.

"He is a killer. A gang member. Pretty good one. He is also our leader. The coffee shop is just a diguise he uses. Oh sorry I thought you knew." Nick said with a grin upon looking into Grigors shocked face.

"You are lying. Stan is not a killer. He is not."

"Isn't he ??", Nick challenged. Whipping out his phone he showed Grigor a video. The others eyes widening. 

Stan had lied to him about everything ?? About his job. About his life. About his name.

About loving him. Everything had been a lie. Grigor was too busy to process everything that he didn't notice, Nick sneaking up to him. 

Everything went dark.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything has an end eventually.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the delay. I hope people are still interested and will like it. Thank you for sticking with me on this project. ❤❤❤

Stan was about to serve a customer their coffee when his phone buzzed in his pocket. The Swiss frowned. Grigor hadn't returned yet. Maybe he had gotten caught up in conversation with Nico and Pierre. Shaking off this feeling of uneasiness, Stan served his customer and fished his phone out of his pocket. He had a message. 

Opening it Stans eyes widened and the phone fell to the ground with a loud clatter. Thank God he hadn't had a mug with a hot beverage in his hand or he would have been fucked. His customer shot him an annoying look when the Swiss bend down to grab his device and dusted it off. His blood freezing in his veins upon seeing the image.

Grigor.

His boyfriend was tied up and gagged. A look of pure terror in his face. To prevent his knees from buckling Stan had grabbed the counter. This couldn't be. Grigor had been at Pierres and Nicos. That much time hadn't passed. He would have noticed. Right ?? 

A message appeared on his screen and Stan tried to control his shaking hand.

If you want him to stay alive be at the docks in 1 hour. Don't test me. I am not in the mood for any of your games, Stanislas.

Nole. 

Enraged Stan smacked his open palm against the counter. Making the mug and dish clatter. His customer shooting him an evil glance. Ripping away his apron Stan paced around. 

"Leave", he hissed at his customer. When the later didn't move, the Swiss shot him an ice cold glance. The other turning as white as a sheet and hurrying out of the door. The only thing on Stans mind now was Grigor. Nole had overstepped his boundries. He had gone too far this time.

Stan could have forgiven his mishaps. The kisses. The touches. The flirting but not this. Especially not this. This was the man he loved. Nole was threatening the man he loved. Still a small part of Stans brain. His rational part whispered that Nole was still his brother. 

With a heavy sigh Stan hurried upstairs. Glancing at his clock anxiously. The Swiss changed into an all black attire. Grabbing the army knife he had stashed under his bed and put it in the pocket of his pants. The air was freezing when he called a cab but Stan couldn't care for that not now.

He shouldn't have gotten Grigor into this. He should have fallen in love with him in the first place. This was his fault. Everything was his fault. Stan hid his face in his hands. He should have taken better care of Nole.

You can't save him, Lukasz words ghosted in his mind. 

The small rational part of his brain whispered, he is your brother.

Stan wanted to scream in frustration. It was either Grigor or Nole. He couldn't have both. Stan knew that Nole wouldn't attack him when he would show up. Not immediately at least. No one knew what was going on in his brain. The Swiss still hoped that he could help his friend.

Yeah what a nice friend indeed who threatened to kill your lover, his head mocked.

Stan wanted the old Nole back. The funny and warm Nole. The happy Nole. He is dead you fool. Just accept it. So this would be the culmination of all huh ?? Stan knew that he would have to hurt Nole to get Grigor out of there, he wasn't ready however. Threats were one thing but the Swiss had never layed a hand on the other. Never.

Stan was truly fighting with himself. He just wanted Grigor back but he knew Nole wouldn't go down without a fight. If it came to this Stan would be prepared to fight the person he considered a brother.  
The cab came to a halt. Stan paying the driver. The gust of wind didn't make him shiver.

If Nole had Girgor then the Serb would have told him the truth about Stan nature. Even if this was over, Stan could only lose. He would lose Grigor and he would probably lose Nole too. 

Breathing out through his nose and bracing himself for whatever he would see or would happen, Stan made his way to the docks. Rounding the corner, the Swiss frowned. If he was honest he had expected Nole to wait for him. Instead he found Grigor who was tied to a pole. His eyes wide when seeing Stan. His voice being muffled by the cloth around his mouth. Instinctively Stan had the urge to run up to him and untie his boyfriend. Hug him tight and make sure he was ok.

But Nole wouldn't make it that easy for him.

Years of knowing his friend, if he could even be called a friend at this point, Stan knew him inside out. He also knew that this was a trap to make him feel safe. Nole would jump out of a corner and try to kill him if he resisted. 

Stan rose his hand to make Grigor calm down. The Bulgarian breathing out through his nose heavily. 

"Show yourself Novak."

A chuckle emerged from behind Stan making him whirl around. An animalistic snarl leaving his throat.

"Oh now I am Novak ?? What happened to Nole, Stanislas ??"

"You lost that right", Stan growled, clenching his fist tight. He would punch the Serb in the face.

"Don't forget who has the upper hand here, Stanislas."

Noles eyes were hard. He was angry. Very angry. It was radiating off him like a heatstroke. Stan could practically see that anger. It was like Nole was emiting it in waves.

"That bastard took you away from me. If I can't have you no one can. Even if this is over he won't want you anyway Stanislas. Take the easy way out. Come with me."

Nole held his hand out towards the Swiss who never moved from where he stood. He just shook his head sadly. He would fight then. In the depths of his heart Stan had hoped it wouldn't come to this. This small, small fraction of his mind and heart didn't want to hurt Nole. 

"You are not my brother anymore."

Something in Noles eyes changed. If there had been hope in his heart that Stan would go with him, this was the point where he realized that there was none left. 

"Then you will die with him", Nole roared. Stan could see the tears for in his eyes. This shouldn't have happened. If Stan would have looked out for Nole this wouldn't have happened. As sad as it sounded Stan knew one of them wouldn't make it out of this alive. 

A tear made it's way down his cheek when Nole lunged himself forward like a hungry predator would at it's prey. Stan was prepared. Of course he was. Plus Nole didn't have the pysical strength to tackle him to the ground. Adrenalin did a lot though so the Swiss braced himself for the impact. Where Nole lacked in strenght he made up for with his brain and swiftness. 

When Nole came towards him like an angry Hurricane, Stan took a step to the side to try and dodge him. The Serb whipped his arm to the side to try and hit him that way but Stan ducked his head and in returned punched Nole in the ribs making him stagger. Ultimately making him land on his knees. Noles eyes were furious.

"I don't want to fight you Novak please."

"Too late Stanislas. You choose him over me", Nole gritted angrily through his teeth and got up panting. Holding his side. 

In the back of his head Stan was still trying to find a way to save Nole.

THERE IS NO WAY, his brain screamed.

It proved to be a mistake to lose focus just for once because Nole was in Stans face in an instant. His foot making contact with Stans injured knee, making the Swiss scream in pain and fall to his knees. 

Fuck.

"You forget I know you too Stanislas. There will be no winner. I offered you a way out but you choose HIM over me", Nole said arrogantly and bitterly.

The Serb was very bitter. Despite his eyes being crazy and angry there was this hint of sadness in them. They couldn't stop this now. One of them would die it was inevitable. 

Stan squeezed his eyes shut as he supported his body with his arms trying to get up. His knee still protesting. Maybe all of them would die here today. No one knew that. Guilt washed over Stan like a tidal wave. Guilt for not having been able to help Nole. Guilt for having dragged Grigor into this. Maybe he really should have died that day. 

Now Lady was Fate was a cruel mistress. 

It was either Nole or Grigor. 

In his heart Stan already knew the answer. There was only one innocent life in all of this. Him and Nole had commited too many crimes already. They were tainted and maybe they both deserved to die. Nole wouldn't die alone. For a split second Stan really considered that option. The easy way out.

Live. Lukasz damn voice was still talking to him. 

He wanted to live but when this was over there would be nothing worth living for. Stan wasn't sure if he could live with the guilt. 

Nole snapped him out of his thoughts by throwing himself at him. Making it hard to breathe for a second when his knees drove into his stomach. His eyes weren't crazy anymore. Rough, huge hands wrapped themselves around Stans neck and squeezed. Hard. Tears falling from Noles eyes.

"LOOK WHAT YOU ARE MAKING ME DO."

Nole was hurting too. There was a fraction of rationality in his voice. He didn't want to do what he was doing. Stan had provoked him. Had forced him to do what he had to do. If it wouldn't have been for Grigor, Stan would have let the Serb strangle him. There was no point in fighting anyway. Tears had pooled in Noles eyes. Falling down his chin and on to Stans face. His heart was screaming at him to make it stop.

He cared about Nole. He had fed his friend a lie. He was still his brother. 

Stan choked miserably. Trying to kick Nole away. His vision was getting blurry. Fuck. He couldn't and wouldn't die like this. He had to get Grigor out of this. Grigors muffled screams could be heard from behind them. Fuck Stan loved him so much. So damn much. With a swift movement the Swiss managed to roll them around and kick Nole away from him. Wheezing and coughing for air. 

"Don't make this even more difficult for me Stanislas."

"Then stop Nole. Just stop."

Stan knew it was too much to ask. The Serb grabbed something from behind his back. The Swiss eyes widening. 

"You can't handle the sight of blood Novak. We both know that. You won't stab me."

Nole snarled.

"I wanted to throw your little boy toy in the ocean. Let him sink like a stone. A great idea don't you think."

Nole threw his head back and laughed. The madness had taken over again. Stan was punched in the face. He was still slow from the lack of oxygen. The Serb was taking advantage of that to pin him down again. Holding the knife against his throat.

"You betrayed me for a bitch."

Nole was trying to stab him but Stan rolled around on his side. Grabbing the Serbs wrists and turning them around so Stan was straddling his hips and pinning him down. Desperately trying to get the knife away from both of them preferably. Nole snarled and shouted. 

The next thing Stan saw was Noles eyes widening in shock. His mouth hanging open. His eyes huge in fear. At first Stan didn't understand. Then he saw the bloody knife in his hand. His own eyes widening. Fuck what the hell had just happened ?? A pool of blood was forming around Noles torso. The knife falling on to the concrete with a clatter.

"Stanislas ??", Nole asked his voice laced with fear. He sounded so scared and young. This voice was the voice that Stan had heard when Noles parents had died. It was like they were kids again.

Oh God.

"Stanislas ??"

Stan dared to look down. There was a deep wound where the knife had torn the flesh. Blood seeping out like a river. Instinctively Stan untied his sweater from his waist and pressed it against the wound. Fuck what had he done ?? 

"Stanislas I am scared. Please don't leave me alone please."

Before Stan even noticed tears were rolling down his cheeks. Fuck what had he done ??

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 

Nole had grabbed Stans shirt desperately. His eyes going hollow upon seeing the blood. He screamed. 

"Make this stop. Make this stop please."

"Shh", Stan cooed and cradled Noles head in his lap. Running a hand through his short raven hair. Both their phones were shattered from their fight. He couldn't even call for help. Fuck. What had he done ??

Nole was breathing was getting ragged. Stan flinched when his friends hand cupped his cheek. He didn't want to look. He had promised to protect him and now Nole was dying in his arm. He sobbed. 

"I am sorry. Oh God I am so sorry."

"Stanislas…"

Stan looked up. Noles hand on his cheek was warm.

"I… I love you Stanislas."

Then the hand slid down Stans cheek and fall on to the concrete with an ear deafening sound. Noles eyes were wide open and hollow. At least he had died with his eyes open. Looking at the person he had loved the most. The person who had ultimately betrayed and killed him.

Stan roared in agony. Pressing his face into his brothers chest and crying like a little child. Apologizing over and over again. Holding him closer than he had ever done. The tears just wouldn't stop and Stan found himself caressing Noles face. For a second he thought about closing Noles still open eyes but then he shook his head. His brother would be afraid of the dark. 

Gently the body was laid on the ground. A noise making Stan whirl around.

Oh God Grigor. 

The Swiss untied the other stepping away from him but Grigor threw himself at him. Hiding his face in his neck. Stan held him close. Grateful that the other wasn't pushing him away and then his knees buckled. He sobbed again hiding his face in his hands. He had killed Nole. He had killed his brother.

"Baby look at me. Look at me please."

Gently Stans hands were removed from his face. Grigor stroking his cheeks. Stan couldn't look at him. He had lost everything. Nole and now Grigor.

"I am so sorry I got you into this. I lied to you I… Everything is my fault."

Grigor hugged him again, stroking his hair they were kneeling on the floor by now. Holding on to eachother like a lifeline. 

"I don't deserve you but I am so glad you are ok."

Grigor pressed his forehead against Stans and they just breathed together until Stan calmed down enough to stand on his own. The Swiss looked at Noles body hiding his face in Grigors shoulder who supported him so Stan wouldn't collapse. 

"I can't leave him alone. I can't. He is afraid of the dark. Please he is afraid of the dark."

Stan just sobbed and Grigors heart broke.

1 year later

Noles funeral had taken a lot out of Stan. He had disbanded the gang right after the incident at the docks. Everything reminded him of Nole. Everything. The pain of having killed his brother never faded. He had handed Rafa and his gang the rulership of New York City.

Grigor had stayed by his side all of the way. Stan would be forever grateful to him. If it wouldn't have been for him, Stan would have lost his mind. He had even thought about death. Grigor kept pulling him out. Tried healing him with his love. He was there when Stan woke up in the morning and when they fell asleep together in the evening. 

Stan had buried Nole on his own. The only person to be there had been Grigor. He had told his boyfriend everything. What had happened in the past and what had happened before he met him. They were past the stage of lies. That had been Grigors wish. 

No more lies. 

Stan hadn't lied to him. Not anymore.

He had played the guitar at Noles funeral. Holding the instrument close. It was the only thing he had left of his brother. The only relic left of a better time. When they had been kids. When they had been happy. 

Stan hoped that Nole had found his peace. He hoped he had seen his parents again. 

Maybe Stan would find his own peace too. Grigor was with him all the way.

On Noles 1st year anniversary Stan opened another coffee shop. In Brooklyn. 

Nole's. Maybe this would be his peace.

Grigor hugged him tightly from behind. Kissing his cheek.

"I am proud of you babe. I love you so much." Stan had nodded. 

When he turned around to kiss Grigor a gust of wind passed them. A stray tear running down Stans cheek.

They would be ok.


End file.
